... all i can share ...

2012-02-09T09:31:00.002+07:00

When i look into his eyes all i see like watching night and day sky. Clearly and glam full of hope. He smiles at me so tender and sincere. Making my heart rough and cry. "What is going on ?" He asked me, i nod and smiles. No, i am not smiles i am so down as like the sky fall into me. "Why you asked that at me ?". He holds my hands and stares me "You are badly so lost" yes i am ... so lost ... and i need you.

I look up to sky, i don't need a fancy car, a big house, bunch of flower, stack of money, happening fashionably accessories and clothing. I wont be anybody else. I want a beautiful life which is precious and deserve being my own. "Listen to me, why you are so gloomy?" he asked as like pushing me to be honest. Silence is not always golden, silence not always good and silence is not always right thing.

"I want by your side, finding what beautiful life is" i said directly for only at once in life.

He nods down and can't further see me, "Nor you and i can grant it rite ?" he wipes my tears and holds me so tight, "Why is so hard to accomplish ?" he asked me "Because i know nor you and i can't make it". "Just let me go and i will let u go, can't bear it longer". I look him for the last so deeply. "There is no heaven between us, there is no right thing inside"

The bench we used to sit colored in white, and always be still white as long as the hours around us. "Why you don't belief we have can make it everything ?" he asked, "No one can compromise that". We look forward without words, this is the end which should end in advance. The bench may change the colored but the person may change start tomorrow.

2012-02-09T08:24:00.000+07:00

I just don't know where its love go
All i see just regret
Is it punishment for my own
I want my life back
I need fulfill my own
I lost the word of happiness
I lost the word of concern
If could turn back time
I just want to remain on my own
Not you and others
Am i that selfish ... ?
Yes, i am
Because my turn to act what i really want
Tired being so patient
Fed up being so silent
So crazy being a doll all the time
So naive being an allowing and obeying whole life
It just enough

2011-12-23T08:36:00.001+07:00

Dear there,

Again I miss you. But not once come out even on words by talk or write directly. I just afraid it will hurt more.
Waiting the email reply, the text not counting greeting even just chat.
Again not even once I told you. Everything is different. I can feel sad, anger and dissapointed much in you. But I am trying hard to get over it when I am with you.
I am so sorry still around you but I can't hinder it for many times I try. Everything just back at beginning where I place myself into you.

The big questions are ? Why you have to go for her ? then why you never do that at me ? why you sacrificed much for her ? why all the plan you had settled before just ruin quickly ?. And ... for me ... why i still be here as home for you ?

I realize I am so ... much ... care that's why I can't go anywhere. How you look ? How you real ? at first time u had made that decision is not necessary for me anymore. Whether you are real or dream just same for me.

Starting to sleep who I remain ? When wake up who I remember ? why the person still same for last 3 years ?

I miss your smile when there is no burden bear you. I don't know when will I see that again ?

Just ... Be fine there.

Ryza Febriasty

2011-11-30T09:52:00.001+07:00

Dear There,

I just miss you. What these all about ? Dear lord, just give me any sign or any clue that is not right. But give me strength if this just fine.

I do believe what the true is. Hard to see, hard to understand but as mild like the butter.

If just ... I was not here, it would be different.

Hoping everything just fine there.

Ryza Febriasty

November Rain

2011-11-23T19:14:00.001+07:00

I always remember the song which Jon Bon Jovi sung about Nobember Rain. It always being breeze, calm and lightly in raining. The smell of the soil and sometimes smell of the leaf.
Today it more different, I rarely find the breeze in raining. Even I always wait this moment. Everything has change. The condition and situation itself. Deep in my heart I miss everything which passed 1 to 2 years back. When I went home late after work, stuck in crowded and sometimes waited long in quee transjakarta line. I miss that moment. Honestly, I miss being single where I don't need caring 2 big families. Where I don't need to share my time each other. All the time just me and my home.
Being married is beyond my life plan, I just didn't know what make me went through to marry that time. Afterwards I enjoy my life being single and I bet I never sorry if today I still single and live with my lovely familiy.
Right now i'm sitting rite in my room. Where I used to sleep before. I won't leave this moment. I still want to be here, I still want to lie and feel the breeze wind through my wooden glass window. I want stay awake just now.
Dear blog, I never afraid being old. But I always afraid I would loose everything I have at back.

The Words

2011-10-28T21:03:00.001+07:00

I open the letter and start to read it.

"if u only know, rest of night I wonder how does it feel to hold your hands ? how does the warm in your hold ? how does the sweet when you smile and caress my face ? how does the tender your whisper and say that you love me.
I wonder if the air I breath, the sun is shines and the stars light at night which I seen will be the same which you see. So ... how the fate can't find ?.
Don't need to turn back the time, it is no longer necessary. I just need a night to dream on you.
I never try to trust and believe you because I am afraid those all will be fade later on. But I always try to see you in real.
When ages come, when you and I remain alone would you just one ask me to be yours. I won't ruin everything which had been chosen just let it step"

I fold that letter and keep it in wooden box. I look the mirror and see the tears. Not because the gray hair and wrinkle skin I have, but because that time never come. What had left just the trace ... Mine and Yours. I wishper 'good night ... just meet in dream'

Khansa Amaira

2011-10-15T21:55:00.001+07:00

Born was October 3, 2011
Time on 8:15 AM
Gender Girl
Weight 2.700 gram
Length 49 cm
Maternity by caesar operation
Hospital in Harapan Kita For Mother and Children
Doctor obgyn was Dr. Gatot Abdurrazak from Harapan Kita Hospital and Asih Hospital
Doctor Hematology was Dr. Noorwati from Dharmais Center of Cancer Hospital

2011-09-27T17:49:00.001+07:00

Dear blog,

This afternoon I went to hospital to meet my obgyn doctor. Okay, the operation will be on Monday on Oct 3 2011 so I have to start entering room on Saturday afternoon. Well ... I had done what I can do so the rest I'll let God creates my destiny.

The baby gain today is 2.700 gram I am enough bless with it. Meaning the injection run well so far. Forget the pain which I feel even after maternity I still have the injection. Well, I'm becoming use with it, with the pain I mean.

Dear khansa, in few days later we will meet. Preaparation almost done the last buat not least pray is always be the best.

Love you, ur mother

Ryza Febriasty

2011-09-26T17:58:00.001+07:00

Dearly blog,

This morning I went to Dharmais Hospital to meet Dr. Noorwati as Hematology to consul about DDimer test. Dharmais hospital is a the biggest national cancer hospital center in Jakarta, Indonesia. Let me explain first about DDimer test. Just wonder about a road whrere there are many cars bring many loads to the pabric. Cuz of the some problems such as crowded, bad asphalt and so on the load to pabric got late. So it was same with my body. The road refers to my antibody, the car refers to my blood and the load refers to the food and the pabric refers to the baby. Anytime ... Can be happen accident right so do with the baby so my obgyn doctor suggested to take maternity opearation before the baby enter to 38 weeks. The day has been settled which is Friday on 30 September 2011.

To lessen the problem I have to take injection twice a day, please don't ask about the pain. The feel was so .... hurt. But is not matter as long as the baby just fine with it. Twice a day for injection  is really above my imagination.

I feel so thank that my husband is right there for me and the baby. He feel sorry whenever see me suffer in pain. Once again is fine as long as the baby is safe.

A mother will do anything to her daughter and son. So do me. I know the operation will make me more pain later but it just fine as long as I will see how beautiful my daughter later. Khansa Amaira will be my future's daughter name. Some in the Internet said that khansaa mean a woman Moslem warrior yes, she is cuz she had been fight for herself to have an effort to life. She is so brave face it so do me as a mother to take all effort.

My dear daughter, i really hope, pray and wish that we meet soon. Mommy really want to see your smile, want to hear your cry, want to touch your softly skin. I dearly cry when I am writing this cuz I really won't to loose you. You are the best I ever had, the best and the most the beautiful gift for me.

No one who surrounding me know exactly what I feel. Only God and me know what I feel.

See you soon my baby, here mommy waits you. All the pray for you.

Love you so much,

Your mother Ryza Febriasty

2011-09-09T07:59:00.003+07:00

Dear there,

Last night i dreamed about you. It was so funny, i woke up and smiled about it.

I took the same university where you took in, we were in same class even took the same subject. All day u just bothered me how to complete ur assignment even u asked me to teach u which i didn't understand either. How come ? but i help out ur study.

I made some food so we could eat together sometimes, even we went to some places just for walking around. All i remembered, we spent much time together.

When we miss someone, usually that person appears in dream in vary stories.

Take care there,

Ryza Febriasty

For A Day

2011-08-25T15:28:00.000+07:00

I never wonder this woman can change me forever. Her name is Amelie, she late 35 years old and still look stunning. She married with famous senate, Bill Jobs.

That time was long night for me with no obvious date and girl this time. I feel enjoy having some girl friends then trap to one girl. I am surely don't like long and boring relationship. I surely like uncomplicated and undemanding girl. My name is Randall Pinkett, 27 years old, gorgeous, stable and attractive.

Sands Restaurant is high and recommended place in this town. This place quite average with formal restaurant as usual. There was only one thing which fading my sight, Amalie. I remembered, that night she wore dark purple gown with natural make up and slightly amazing. From her appearance she was a mature enough, sounds good because i like mature, stable and independent woman as like her. She sit alone seemed waiting someone in that table. Once she looked her phone and again then again looked around her. I waited who is the lucky one made her wait that long.

Almost an hour, i didn't see any man came forward to her. So, what should i waited for to see her closer ?. "Good night, is the table fill in ?" average greeting "Yes, it was but no longer" she feel bothered and i knew it. "Randall Pinkett, new comer in this city", "So ... ?" she smiled "Amelie" we shake hand and that the start i knew her.

"Is it boring journey as you think rite ? accompany a husband to city around, country around just for popularity then grading the level in society" she laughed. "Not at all, many woman want to sacrifice as u do right now" I analyzed her more. "For me i just enough with it. I want at home with two or three kids around me. Don't have to wear and pose as a fake" she just outspoken but that was true anyway no one in this world can suffer in fake in long time. "Okay, what will u do tomorrow ?" i asked her. "Uhm, formal breakfast with some my husband's associates after that still no plan". "Come with me, tomorrow will be the last day in this city. My flight will be at 3 PM so i will have much time to looking around. How that sounds ?" asking girl out is just simply thing for me. She stands from sit that time i thinks she feels annoying "Here this my card, just call me then. I have to go, the driver just come". Not smile even say thank you at all. All i did just received her card and let her go.

The day after i come to Lonelines and enjoy short trip with her. We go to traditional market to art gallery. She is adorable, just know how to make me pleasure in this trip. I come from good family and i delight with it, but not with her. She is an orphan who live in orphanage until high school then get scholarship in architect major. She had been married for 7 years and still no kid. I think her husband has taken everything from her, he asks her to stop working, her society so that her true self. "Can i contact you after this day ? i mean ... you know ... your husband ?" i grinned at her. "Maybe, so ... why not ?" she answered and smiled. My heart races whenever see her smile. It just complete our trip.

A year flies. She becomes a good friend of me, complain whenever i go date with wrong girl and remind me how to stop playing with them. Believe me, i change by time. One day she shares my by mail that her husband cheat with a younger woman. I just can't believe how come ? more later she says that her husband need another woman who can give him a kid.

I book a ticket to come to her city just to meet her. I feel so annoying with her mail. She looks so desperate and lost. She waits me at the airport. She looks so skinny than the last time i meet her. "Thank you for coming" she smiled but not me. I feel so angry to see her like this. "What just happen at you ? you just like a dumb" i poured my anger when see her like this. "You are not helping at all, really" she put off her glasses and i see dark circle under her eyes. Her eyes just like panda. She walk away to leave me "I am sorry i don't mean it" suddenly she hugs me tight "I am so tired Ran, whole. Body and soul" it is the first time i see her cry like a baby, remind me to my nephew who ages 3.

to be continued

Only Be

2011-08-23T14:49:00.003+07:00

Feel sorry whenever write this
Feel wrong to put each word in it,

Why you never ask me to leave
Why you never ask me to stop
Why you never ask me to forget
Each word, each sentence and each memory which could bring out

The more to stay the more scars left
The more to keep the more bind in between
The more ... just kind hurting

If there is one day,
Which can give you the heart
When morning come and awake
Don't need to worry
Because there is still life inside

There is time
Heart aches with a hunger and the want
That you were mine

I'll Only Believe

2011-08-10T13:46:00.001+07:00

I've seen this place a thousand times

I've felt this all before
And every time you call
I've waited there as though you might not call at all

I know this face I'm wearing now
I've seen this in my eyes
And though it feels so great, I'm still afraid
That you'll be leaving anytime

We've done this once and then you closed the door
Don't let me fall again for nothing more

Don't say you love me unless forever
Don't tell me you need me, if you're not gonna stay
Don't give me this feeling, I'll only believe it
Make it real or take it all away

I've caught myself smiling alone
Just thinking of your voice
And dreaming of your touch, is all too much
You know I don't have any choice

2011-08-05T11:55:00.003+07:00

Dreaming Again

2011-07-26T07:13:00.001+07:00

Dear there,

Few days last night, i dreamt off u again. Our usual chatted. As i remembered, that night i turned on my laptop to online after received ur sms "I am online".
When i woke, there was no laptop around me even i couldn't find any sms from u.

U seemed haunting me, i wondered there was something bothered u lately. What was all about i am not sure.

Sometimes i questioned much things by myself, why there was many unspoken things kind of wall between us. I had asked u once, but as u said that all won't change anything.

Missing u all heart,

Ryza Febriasty

The Fonts

2011-07-22T10:05:00.003+07:00

Some examples unique fonts which adorable. If u want u can download here.

Download the file
Unzip the file
Right click, choose 'instal'
Open your microsoft then on the 'Font Subject' you will find them which u had installed

RyzaFebriasty : Pea Bake at 350

RyzaFebriasty : Pea How Sweet Eats

RyzaFebriasty : Pea I am Baker

RyzaFebriasty : Pea La Fuji Mama

RyzaFebriasty : Pea Make it and Love It

RyzaFebriasty : Pea Our Best Bites Doodles

RyzaFebriasty : Pea Picky Palate

RyzaFebriasty : Pea Rachael Rossman

RyzaFebriasty : Pea The Lettered Cottage

RyzaFebriasty : Pea Tidy Mom

RyzaFebriasty : Pea Two Peas and TheirPod

Heart Talking

2011-07-04T13:22:00.000+07:00

Someone told me "Crush only lasts for a maximum of 4 months; if it exceeds, then you are already in Love". I thrilled whenever read this, was it true ?.

I love my husband and no doubt at all, seven years journey were not short time but still after married we needed adjusting more. Last June 19, 2011 it was our 1st anniversary. No special celebration, no cake, no gift even we missed the planned for having dinner. We just spent at home as usual until he said "Happy anniversary" and i said "Happy anniversary too". We grinned then laughed. We know there will be many obstacles we should cover and that not easy as the fact.

And then i met him, the one who i called The Dream.

It was afternoon rite in 2008, when i was in office and chatted with my best friend in Office, you know ... girl things ... chit-chat. He just buzzed and greeted. I really have no idea who is he ? and reassure i don't like to talk to strangers even it just in chat. Started from name, ages, nationality, hobbies until religion. What was the funny, after few times we chatted we used to have same thought. So ... what is that ?

Times flies, not count how many i woke up at night just to share many stories with him. He is younger than me. I feel so different, maybe because there are so many similarities we have. More i know him, more i respect him the more i care to him.

I used to imagine asked him to take me, whenever i feel down at least i could get rid for everything bounced me. But the fact i never told him in words. Sometimes, i just stare him on cam then smile even sometimes i cry. I am a kind of wordless person.

Until today, he lives further but that not matter. Because at first time we met, we had been separated by miles and times.

So, what is that ? am i in crush ? if it was, it would have more than 4 months. It already took more than 3 years.

Whatever the path is, what i surely know that his trace always in mind because he had became something for me.

My friends used to say "You had passed sweet and bitter in relationship, u may feel down sometimes but u never let your life going sink"

Japan Origami

2011-06-22T15:39:00.001+07:00

What a beautiful folding art from Japan which call 'Origami'. Here these some origami's that i made at office this afternoon.

Sailboat

Fish

Pigeon

2011-06-22T07:37:00.000+07:00

Have you ever feel your tears ready to burst, but you keep ?
Want to share your pain, but no place
Aim to talk, but can't find the listener
Have to say, but miss the words
What you need exactly not in front of you
Which you want just hard to get

Thinking about isolated place to step
Where no one can't recognize
Just a place to remove all the sickness
Poorly, not even once have brave

If just, have stronger control
It would be different
From which the day start in

Come, whenever there is a chance
Stay, while your heart whispered
But choose what is good

Call Me Teddy

2011-06-17T13:08:00.000+07:00

Good Evening, please u can call me Teddy. I am a boy bear who belong to ryza's collection. I am new here. But, all i know she is kind to me. She just bought me a new brown jumper corduroy jeans. So lovely outfit. I am not meet yet her others bears collection. But she had told me there are many in her room. This evening, she takes me to her table office.

It is the paper handbag which my brown jumper corduroy jeans in it

The store which place in Sun Plaza on level 3 #B-21, Mall Ciputra Seraya 2nd floor #25 and Senayan City 4th floor #111

Look i am cool right, with new outfit off course

Want to see my nose he3x ... (hei ... thank u Ryza !)

Teddy House Brand rite on my purse

Tada ...

2011-06-07T12:45:00.003+07:00

Dear Friend,

Tada ....

Look, there is a magic here. I am beside u now. But, all i see just ur moody and sad face. U always lower your head, nod to ground seems look wherever ur feet walk. U just stare at me without any words, i know how hard to believe and i know how difficult to understand. Touch your finger and smile then hold it "Don't be like that". Hug u sincerely, close my eyes trying hard to feel what u feel.

Tada ...

Look, i bring u to a place where there is only tree, river, mountain. Is it enough to comfort u ? But all i see, just ur sorrow. What else i could do for u ? U lay on my shoulder, talk everything. At once i nod showing that i listen all. Until u sleep there.

Tada ...

The alarm ringing, the sun shines between my curtain. Already morning. Opening my eyes "It just a dream" i am smiling. My eyes bring me to the shooter sun.

Even just one, can it be true someday ? take care there.

Ryza Febriasty

Still

2011-06-06T07:46:00.000+07:00

Funny when you stop and think, Time goes faster than you blink, Nothing’s ever like it was, Girl we’ve got a special thing, Your the happiness it brings, Is more than enough, I know it’s hard to believe, Your still the biggest part of me, All I’m living for.

It’s hard to breathe when we’re apart, You’re that sunshine in my heart, I keep you here inside, You’ve been everything to me, You’ve been and always will be, The apple of my eye, And I know it’s hard to believe, Your still the biggest part of me, All I’m living for.

I still think about you, I still dream about you, I still want you and need you by my side, I’m still mad about you, All I ever wanted was you, Your still the one, your still the one.

If you love me, look into my eyes and say you do, I’ve been waiting all my life for someone just like you, Baby after all we’ve been through.

Girl I’m still in love with you, And I want you to know, I do, I do.

Song from Bryan Mcknight, love ... love ... the song

You Are Still The One

2011-06-04T22:16:00.003+07:00

7 Years Old Boy And Girl

"Why r u asking me to play this gross game ?" the boy asked "It is not gross. Yesterday, my mom took me to wedding invitation. I saw beautiful groom and bride with white dress. I want to be like that someday. So ... stop complaining ... you should stay behind me as the fake groom"

10 Years Old Boy And Girl

"Why do you ask me to go to birthday party ? i don't like ur friend ... she is a nerd in my class" the boy said. "Stop it, she is not a nerd as u think. She is my best friend, so do u. We can be a great friends till end"

12 Years Old Boy And Girl

"Where do u will continue ur junior high ? can i come with u ?" the girl asked. "No ... just take another school. I am good with my basket ball team in my chosen school" the boy shrink.

13 Years Old Boy And Girl

"Please help me to do my homework" The boy pleased on the phone "No way ... u can ask ur friends, but not me. I have to go on my music course" The girl put off the phone

15 Years Old Boy And Girl

"Why u not choose one of ur class mate to the prom ?" The boy asked. "I wont, i don't believe them so do my mom. So u r the only solution which i have" The girl stares him with sincere.

16 Years Old Boy And Girl

"I had applied the same senior high school as u did. R u mind ?" The boy asked. "No, not at all. While ... you will busy with some girls later. And please ... stop flirting to many girls. It is suck ... u know that" The girl leave him alone on the ice cream store.

18 Years Old Boy and Girl

"I don't know what should i do ? should i take his offer to having dinner with him ?" Asked the girl. "No way ... he is a jerk. All his want only playing you". Answered The boy "What ... how dare saying like that. Stop talking with me!"

21 Years Old Boy and Girl

"I want u take care my the only one daughter, i trust u Son " The father of the girl shakes his hand. "I'll try my best. As long as she is not as stubborn as i know" The boy shrink. "Dad ... stop it. And u stop it ... he is not my boyfriend even my big brother ... I am okay in this dorm university"

22 Years Old Boy and Girl

"Is it ur girlfriend ?" The girl asked then the boy nod. "Tell her, i wont take u anywhere. I hate the way she looked. Stop being jealous, we are nothing"

23 Years Old Boy and Girl

"Once u make her cry ... once u will face me Okay !" The boy talked to The girls' boyfriend. "Watch ur mouth. U r nothing to her. Should i remember u where ur place before ?" The girls' boyfriend sharpen the stare.

25 Years Old Boy and Girl

The girl went go to the boy's apartment. Knocked the door "What happen to u ? u r so awful" The boy asked. The girl just hug him tightly and cry "My heart pain, we broke up. He got engage with her mother chosen girl"

27 Years Old Boy and Girl

"Thank u for the treat, why u don't take her. It is ur birthday" The girl dress beautifully "We just broke yesterday. She had found another and confessed it to me" The boy smiles and lowering his head. "I am sorry ... u can count on me as ur sharing place. Thats the friends are for right ?" the girl smile tenderly.

28 Years Old Boy and Girl

"Good bye ... take care okay. Please keep an eye to my parents, i am counting u" The girl hug the boy tightly. "I will, whenever u arrive, call me okay. I'll wait ... ur call ... i mean. Be success in ur promotion Okay" The boy smiles. The person in front of him, will fly thousand miles away from him. "Being good ... in future Okay"

30 Year Old Boy and Girl

"Why u don't tell me that u will come ?" The girl surprised whenever he found The boy already in front of apartment "Surprise cuz ... it is ur birthday. Meanwhile i bring many gifts from ur parents" The boy smiles. "And ur gift ... for me ?" her eyes sparkling as like as an ice. The boy takes the gift, "I can only give this" He takes the ring and put on her sweet finger "Just be mine. From now, then and later" The boy caressed the girl face, she cried. "At seven i had told u to be my fake groom on my backyard home, now you are here ... as my future groom in front of my door" The girl smiled. "We are too fool to realize that we had been tied into one from seven till end" he kissed her gently. "Love u" Said The boy "Love u" Replied The girl.

A Call

2011-05-26T15:18:00.000+07:00

Dear friend,

Thank you for calling me, it was very first time to hear your voice. Never see you, never touch you even never hear your voice before.

Doesn't need many explain to show the feeling itself. I feel so grateful that i have found you.

Take care there,

Missing You

2011-05-11T07:14:00.000+07:00

Dear Friend,

Do u know, few weeks ago i dreamt about u. U called me, shared many stories, laughed and said that u missed me. If u just know how lost i was. Wont to wake up but the sun was ready to shine.

What r u doing so far ? how ur weight ? how ur look ?

See u in another unpredictable time, hope u r good there.

Bye

Ryza Febriasty

Haw Flakes

2011-04-14T08:49:00.000+07:00

I used to eat this sweet and sour coins candy since kindergarten. This candy was from China, made from haw (fruit of Chinese Haw torn) and sugar. The color was pink to brown. The shapes as like the cent of coin. It was not only sort of candy but sort of snacks for me.

Whenever my mom asked me who aged 5 "What do you want, i want to go to groceries store", i said "Haw Flakes ..., 2 plastics". Each plastics contained with 10 rolls candy. Imagine please, i could eat all that candy only few hours.

The sweet and sour that time took me to China Town, i never been there, but someday will. Once i started to eat, once i couldn't stop.

I found this candy when i went to Grand Indonesia, while i walking to food court alley, i saw this candy all over in sold. I looked finding some money on flour. I took one ... but i consider to take another. So, here these some pictures about The Haw Flakes.

The packaging like the roll of coin cent

Circle coin of cent which colour in pink to dark

The thick only in mm, The Haw Flakes.

A Letter From My Best Friend

2011-04-12T15:18:00.001+07:00

Dear There,
How are you ? how your day in your new place so far ?. From the last mail you had sent me, seemed you were so pleased to leave there.
You looked fine, beside i know the cold weather is your favourite.
I missed the time you sent me many sms when i got chicken pox.
I missed the time spent many days having chat with you.
I miss everything.
I don't know whether a minute you remain my trace ? do you ?
Everything has changed but can't believe i am still same.
I miss your previous presence.

I Never Told You, No..., I Never Told You

2011-04-08T13:05:00.000+07:00

I miss those blue eyes, How you kissed me at night, I miss the way we sleep Like there's no sunrise, Like the taste of your smile, I miss the way we breathe
But I never told you, What I should have said, No I never told you, I just held it in
And now I miss everything, About you, I can't believe I still want you
After all the things we've been through
I miss everything about you, Without you
I see your blue eyes, Every time I close mine, You make it hard to see
Where I belong to when I'm not Around you, It's like I'm not with me

From 9th Floor

2011-03-16T09:56:00.000+07:00

I was on 6th floor at my Head Office from 2005 until 2010. And today in 2011, i move to 9th floor which designed to modern one.

Wednesday morning started with bright sun. I considered to capture some shoots from my window. From my back, i could see the biggest mosque in southeast Asia "Istiqlal Mosque' which located on Central Jakarta.

The bridge divides Istiqlal Mosque to head office

Istiqlal Mosque

From all those shoots you may exactly guess what is the office name ?

Placed and Pulled

2011-03-15T09:59:00.002+07:00

It has been few years i laid in this place "Placed and Pulled".

I have been placed myself on surface many times, but something pushed me to go deeper .
I have been placed myself below the surface and then slept in it until today.
I have been placed myself deeper to feel how it felt, what would happen ?.
I have been placed myself and felt so comfy in it.

And now,
I am trying to pull it.
Everything i keep.
Not only the things but also the traces.

Will be it better ?
It is far, beyond my forecast.
Am i able to forecast ?
I am

Dissapointed, just an ending but the process just pain.

6 Days After Ages 28

2011-02-27T18:04:00.001+07:00

So, I already 28 this month 'February' this year. I'm getting older but not making me old at all. People still think I'm a collage student. Well, I wont to be a sentimental person but realizing or not, i have.

What the most i want in this 28 ? i want to stay healthy so i can make my parents still proud of me, helping others who need help, becoming a good wife and mother later on and still being a productive employee.

Growing up, being wise, more and more being powerful.

Bernard Bear on "The Unicycle"

2011-02-25T09:55:00.001+07:00

Unspoken

2011-01-17T07:48:00.000+07:00

If only have courageous that time,
this love won't end like this
if there is persistence,
the story won't last this way

This love had left wound
Linger many nights with tears,
Memorizing the love

What is love ?
Which beyond the whole thing
How about fate ?
Which hard to adjust, merely to understand

A person ever loves you with whole soul

2011-01-09T22:30:00.001+07:00

really miss everything which i left behind,especially you. words will never enough to describe this,but loneliness is quite enough. don't need any promises,just please do came whenever breath. may dream catcher come always.

A Letter For A Dream

2011-01-02T10:46:00.000+07:00

Dear Dream,

Dream, have you there ? I am in sleeping tonight. Have you touch me beautifully this night ? Have you remain here until i wake up next morning ? even reality is wide spread front of me.

Dream has made me fade many times, but again and always wait it when night come. Don't you know i always wait you to flourish my sleep. No matter bad, beautiful, or horror the dream is. My brain is waiting to make a day.

I start to close my eyes, pray and sleep. See yo there.

Sincerely,

Ryza Febriasty

Happy New Year 2011

2010-12-31T09:51:00.001+07:00

Art Pictures

2010-12-30T11:14:00.000+07:00

A Letter For God

2010-12-30T07:49:00.002+07:00

Dear Kindness God,

have you listen all my prayers ? have you given me any clue that i would deserve to have a luck, some luck and could be just one luck. I'm tired to dosomething as good as i could, sometimes i feel tired to pray. I am not a bad person and i am not a good person also. But have you know, how tired i am in trying, have you know how hard i am to be tough, have you know how strong my belief as your creation. Blood as started, slowly cover with bones and meats, give highest level as human, and know ... i want your prove that you exist.

I want that badly, but in a minute you make my belief doubt but more over could my belief stronger. I wont hear anymore about patient, i am enough with it. Just one luck, only one, is it hard to share only one luck for me ? meanwhile you can give much luck to another who you chosen then my asking is ... why not me ?

Sincerely,

Ryza Febriasty

A Heart Which Left In You - Part 3

2010-12-27T07:47:00.004+07:00

This is The end of the story, see you in another stories. Can't wait to make utterly brilliant.

“I miss you Mom” I called Jason whenever I arrived at the airport, “I miss you also, have you warned what I said ?”, “Sure, behave … and behave” I smiled “That is a good boy. So handed to Dad, I want to talk with him”. From this far, I can hear Jason called John, my husband. “You just arrived ?”, “Yes, just did. Is everything okay there ?, how about Jason ? have he eat ?”, “Honey, everything is fine here, relax. Jason will be fine with me. So do you there, please take care. I miss you, big hug and kiss from me and Jason”. I smiled, felt guilty because I worried too much. “I miss you both also. Big hug and kiss from me”. The rest chat, we talked about Jason uniform and courses. It sounds silly, but I never let them alone too long. “John, I love you”. “I love you too Anne”

I have taxi take me to a hotel which I booked yesterday. This is 4 stars hotel, which located center of town. The style is modern designed. A porter takes my bags to my room, well … for few nights it will be my permanent stay. I lay my body on bed, type a messenger “Mike, I am here”. I put off my blouse and high heels. “Here, where?” I received his reply “i'm here“. I smile while put photo frame of John and Jason on the lower shelf beside the bed. “Really, where are you now, I should come to pick you”. I type again “No, I already in the hotel. See you tomorrow. Want to sleep, jet lag cause the flight. Tired. You guide me Okay. Bye.” I turned off the messenger and once see the frame “I miss you Guys, love you two”.

This is a tropic country, don’t ask about the weather okay, it obviously like a summer all the time. Even the receptionist said that this month was a rainy season. But, I wonder when the rain will come. So, I consider to wear white dress. With sunglasses in my bag, comfort wages sandal, and linen stylist hat. Hey … what is wrong ? I am a tourist right. I wait him in the restaurant. I enjoy the breakfast, the porridge, hot tea, toast with pineapple jam in it. My phone rings twice, “So, where are you ?” it was Mike. “Don’t you recognize me Mike, am I that old ?” I teased him. “Anne, you just 30, the last time I saw you when Jason born, the first time” I laughed. “Me, in white Mike” directly ended the conversation. My heart races everywhere, as like a teenage meet her boyfriend. But absolutely I am not a teenager, I am a woman with one son and one husband off course.

I sip the jasmine tea, the warm of the sun touch my skin softly. “Anne” He just stands in front of me, with dark blue jeans and turquoise shirt. He is so awesome, as like a petal. “Mike, I am glad to see you again” I try to be cool, off course not let him knows how nervous I am. I put off my hat then smile at him. “You are lovely” I don’t have to ask him to sit, he just sit beside me and kind of admiring myself. “I just …” he stopped, “Mean, I … don’t think you will come. So … are you alone ?” asked him. I nod. “Well, I …” he stopped again. “I … well … I’m happy then … I …”, I reached his hand “Don’t say anything Mike, just take me to some places okay”

The first place we come is the national museum. He tells a lot about history, how struggle the heroes and so on. After that, he takes me to the tallest tower in city, see many tiny things by goggle. Finally, he takes me to this garden, the largest garden park as he says. I am truly hypnotized because in this park, I can see deer everywhere. “Oh my God Mike, I am not in pole as like Santa but I can see deer. I have to capture this, for Jason of course” I captured with my camera. “So, how Jason, how old is he now ?” asked him “Seven” I still capture the group deer, I think it must be the family there. “So, your husband ?” asked him again. “He is fine” I put on my camera in my bag and put the hat on. “So, are you happy then ?”. I pause my breath then look at him “What you see ?” I smiled “I think you are happy”. “Okay, it is nice” I crossed my leg then looked him again. “So, what I will tell you is, I can’t come to your wedding day because I just get three days off. Next Monday I have duty trip to another town. Well, it will be boring meeting but I have to be there to assign a contract. I am sorry Mike” I stand and walking around the chair to feel the air “So much sun in here, nice country, right Mike”

He just pause few minutes even almost half an hour, I count it. “Are you mad at me ?” I asked “No, Anne … do you really can’t come for my wed ?” he asked. “What do you mean ? I crossed thousand miles to come, I am sorry I can’t come to your wed, but what can I do ? meanwhile I can’t let Jason alone without me that long. So, tell me … are you mad ?”

I feel so naive to come here. “Anne”, he grabs my hand to sit beside him “I just want to know, do you really come for my wed ?”, “Well, you asked me to come … so I come?” I answered. “Do you miss me ?”. I froze, “What do you think ?” I asked “You not come only for my wedding Anne, but you come also for me, that the answer I really want to hear”

Four days visa, three days in this country, and today it is the first day. I just called again and texted my husband, send him the picture which I captured in the park. The sun aside more friendly in this hour, afternoon, the weather feel warmth. He takes me to a souvenir place, I buy traditional cloth for three of us, even I don’t know when I will wear that.

“Tonight, I will meet her. I want you to come” I shocked “What for” I asked “I want you to meet her, I want she knows you” well, what it is ? “Oh, okay, because I owe you much today, I will come” he looked me deeply. I don’t know what is mean, but I know what his feel. He doesn’t want rotate fast, he just want me here, stay here always.

Back to my room, take bath to come his invitation. I never meet her before but he already told many things, so in my opinion I had known her much. I wear black satin gown with my high heels. I realized, how woman I am today, I answer his call “I will come in 10 minutes, by the way, where you will take me?”. In ten minutes, I meet him in the lobby, as usual he stares me in admiring but lately, I feel so bother in way he looks. “Mike, don’t see me like that. You make me nervous”, “Because you are beautiful” he said “No, don’t say that, take that word to your girl” I nodded.

In thirty minutes, he takes me to a grand ball room where there a girl already waited us. I know her, she must be Savannah. She has beautiful long perfect brown wavy hair. Her skin so light and care much as I see. She smiles at me at first I come, she is so awesome, “You must be Anne, I am savannah” we shake hand. I feel so old around them, “Yes, I am Anne” we start talking, at once I see Mike stares at me and again I feel so bother with it. From this conversation, I can take conclusion that Savannah is an ambitious person quite difference with Mike. She tells me about her study in two majoring subject and so on. I thought she must be an open minded person, outgoing and kind of attractive girl. No wonder Mike already fall to marry this girl. “I hope the wedding day will run well and you as bride frontier I would say, may all the happiness around you both always”, “Thank you Anne. We really need that. Right Hon ?” she smiles to Mike and they start to talk each other that part I really don’t understand. Looking them, I feel so unsafe and uncomfortable. And thanks God, finally it must be end. I can smell her scent from here, well … they look quite match as far I see.

This morning remind me to my second day in this hotel. I got hard night to sleep because the time difference, so I chat with Jason and John until I fall asleep. My phone rang, “Can I enter Anne?” Mike asked “No, I am not bath yet, and … look so awful” I answered “Can I enter Anne ?” he repeated “No, I said. Why don’t you wait at lobby, I will come in half an hour, more and less” I answered. “Anne, I already in front of your room”. I stood shockingly “How dare you know my room, wait a min” . I open the door and let him in. He brings a flower for me, white lily, he still know my favorite. “You should wait at lobby. Wait me okay, I will take shower”

Today, he takes me to playing ground, at once he holds my hands at first I feel shy and in comfort but more over I let him. We are not known in short time. He has been close one since long, I can say that he is my part. Honestly, I don’t know what kind of relationship we had so far. It is more than friendship, more that brother as sister but he has been something for me, he is so special too special. I care him a lot, I like him … and realize or not, I love him.

The last ride we take is pinwheels. From this height I can see many lamps as like beautiful carpet, my camera always in my hands, capture everything for Jason. “Anne, there is something I want to ask you” he said “What ?”, “Have dinner with me tomorrow, before you home” he looked me so serious, “Should we ?” I wont let his eyes out of me, I enjoy the time he looked me, so tender, honest and loving. “We should do this, I ask you for the first and can be the last for us”. I nod, my face redden hold my tears run. I know he will marry soon, but I wont hear any last word from him. “Okay, tomorrow … I’m yours Mike” I looked him, holding my tears “Okay, make it beautiful “

I don’t know why I have to go to saloon to hair do, but I want to be special tonight. I have packed my things properly, and one box which I wrapped with a beautiful ribbon. A gift for the Mike and Savannah. I touch it softly, I know him so well and soon I have to let go him well also. My phone ring “I am in front of your door, don’t yell again. It’s dinner right, so make it perfect then”. I open the door and see him in delight. He is so young, so bright too much kind for me. “So Mike, where we will go tonight” I asked “To your favorite place” he answered.

I have no idea he will take me cross the Island. It only takes 2 hours from the port. The boat takes us to Marina island. “So the dinner is … seafood“ I asked him doubt “No, I know you hate them, we can chose another”. After eat light dinner, we walk aside the beach to reach the rest area on the bridge. “Why you married Anne ?” he asked me “Is it a question ?” I asked “Yes, why ? do you love him ?” he asked. “I do love him Mike” I answered “More than you love me”. I down my face see the sand cover my feet “Do you?”

I still silent “Why you keep your feeling from me. You know, how I want you bad” Mike still walking and leave me behind, “And I know how you need me back, why you lie ?” he asked. “I am not lying, and you know that for sure. What I come here for, to make many memories before you forget all”

He closes to me “You are totally wrong, I never let you go” he said, “I love him, I wont hurt him even you, i am afraid do wrong Mike. I am sorry” I sit on the wood bench, “Can I hug you” I don’t know what to say, I feel so wrong but I really want it. I am tired keep this feeling, I am tired hiding it, I am tired to act normal and fine, I am tired for lying anymore. “You will marry soon Mike, you are not allow keep this, I am married woman and I feel wrong to feel it. You know me right, know me like my soul, you should know anything without words for me Mike, I … “ he just hug me from back, so tight “I waited this quite long, you said you are mine tonight and I said please make this night beautiful for me”

He handed me to stand, hold my hands and take me to his hug, I wont it end but it should end, he kiss my forehead, caress my hair and my face, at once and can be the last he said “I love you Anne, you know for sure”. I am not reply it, I just keep silent. I am afraid do wrong but I am sure he knows what I want to say that I love him more than he thought.

My phone ring and it is from him “Where are you ?” He asked “In the airport” I answered “Why you not let me to be with you right now” he asked. “Because I can’t say bye to you” I answered. I can hear his breath deep and heavy, “I have something for you two, I leave it to receptionist hotel, I’m sorry I can’t come Mike … I’m …”. “Anne” He cut my saying “Is logic if you have two husband” he said, I laughed not because funny because I cover my crying “You tell me. Mike, Happy wedding for you two, and don’t do anything crazy after this okay” I warned him “She is such a Peri on fairy tale, you know that. She is real, perfect and she loves you badly” I wipe my tears. “I’ll come there, wait I’m on my way to airport” Mike shooters me.

“No…” I yelled at him “Stop it Mike, please make it easy for me” I said “You said, you have duty trip on Monday right, you lied, you can’t stand see me with another right, you can’t stand see me love another beside you, am I right ?” I can hear his breath heavily, I think he runs to get me but impossible to get here in that short time. My flight will on boarding few minutes from now. “Yes, all you said was true, I am liar, yes I am.”

“Anne, I just want you” I can hear he is crying, I hold my breath “I’m going Mike” I turned off my phone, show my ticket for boarding.

“Here the box which Ms. Anne leave, please sign here Sir” the receptionist offer a piece of paper and let Mike assign it. “Thank you, Mr. Mike” she gives him a box with beautiful ribbon on it “Thank you”. He brings it and directly opened it in car, it is a honeymoon ticket to Maldives and a card in it. He takes and reads it “For the Brides”. He stares that card, don’t have any word to say. His sight so far, empty and cold. He nods and reads the last sentences in that card “Happy beautiful weeding”.

A Heart Which Left In You - Part 2
A Heart Which Left In You - Part 1

The Answer

2010-12-24T12:41:00.004+07:00

A Heart Which Left In You - Part 2

2010-12-15T12:54:00.017+07:00

"Would you come Anne ?" he asked me on the messenger "Hopefully" i wrote it "I want to meet you" it seemed fade me away "And will be lovely to know your fiancee" I waited another messenger, one minute, two minutes, five ... to few minutes later "We are not engaged yet Anne". I shocked "What did you mean ?" okay, i was not curious about it but my thought raced nowhere "I will marry in next two weeks" it must be a good news for me but not at all "Marry ? next two weeks ? crazy you are, surprise" i wrote in speed "Maybe, but please come early before the wedding, i really want to meet you Anne. Can you ?". I couldn't reply his messenger, i took and healed deep breathe, needed a space and air to calm" Hello ... Anne, do you faint or die there :) ?" my phone rang again, i typed new messenger to him "I am not, i'll think about it. I have to go" i was signed off from the conversation. Need some times to set with all of it.

"Mom, why you look so quite ?" Jason climbed to my bed and laid beside me "I am Okay honey" I kissed his checks and smiled "You are not. In my school if there was a girl cried it would something bad happened. What is wrong mom ?". Okay, Jason not an adult but he is quite bright for his ages. "I am ... fine" i answered shortly. "You are not, i saw your eyes watered". Wait, Jason just saw me cried. "Really ?" i asked him then he nod. Jason hugs me "Something wrong with me, am i that bad Mom ?" i felt my tears run "No, you are good, don't say that. It is not related with you even dad" i tried to comfort him. Jason still see me with curiosity. "I am okay honey" I smiled and hug him tightly.

A Heart Which Left In You - Part 1

Chicken Soup For The Couples Souls

2010-12-05T15:47:00.004+07:00

It wasn't a new book and wasn't the latest book i have read. I like to read chicken soup session for kid, mother, teacher and now the couple. From my opinion chicken soup it made to support, motivate, warm your passion to step in life. That was why the author made many sessions for chicken soup because they knew, human were living like a circle. We were born as a baby, grew up to toddler, teen, mature finally granny. We never be able to live alone, it is not a caution but it is warning. If you, reader, have not read yet this book. Me, as always be a santa, will give freely which sourced by 4 shared. Oh, i love 4 shared much not least i love IDM (Internet Download Manager) to make it easier and faster.
Here comes the ebook : Have Enjoy Chicken Soup For The Couples Souls (click and link it).
Then, if you have troubled while downloading it, try to email me on ryza_febriasty@yahoo.com or leave the messages on my chat box i would help you.

See on another ebook guys.

Part of Me Was Missed

2010-11-26T22:47:00.001+07:00

if just could tell
if just could whisper
if just could share
what is missed
what is needed
what is wanted
if just not need words
not need sign
even clue
to show
love,pure, and tender. Words never enough
words never able
to mean it
when heart says 'love me when you used to love'

A Heart Which Left In You - Part 1

2010-11-18T16:09:00.003+07:00

I used to come to this cake shop which offer delight cakes, cookies, ice cream, tea to coffee. What cake i like most is opera cake which pour with hazelnut prickers. Love to drink jasmine sure with sugar free with one cup green mint ice cream with cherry on top. I spend much time here just fro reading a novel, less tiring or just want to be alone like i prefer right now.

Melissa, the waitress who is so lovely served me whenever i came to this place "So, how your life today ?" asked her while placing the order on the table. "What you see ?" replied me with bit smile "Oh ..., seems not a good day huh ?". "All i need is hug, you know that" Joked her then laughed. She let me with my order. I sipped the tea, today i ordered mint tea, closed my eyes and once saw my cellphone. I'm not waiting my husband even the only one son called me. I waited an email, a text or could be a messenger. But not one of if it signed. My sight was empty, looked to the wall which is made by glass. An hour left, and goes to two and half hours. I still freezing with an empty sight, "Hello ..., are you here ?" Melissa came and once again greet me "Am i that lost ?" I smiled to her "A lot, any story which you want to share ?" asked her politely "Even i hard to start to talk" laughed "Just the bill please, just hard to breath right now" added to joke. "Holly sick ... why don't die later on" we both laughed a lot".

Morning as usual hectic time in my house, my litle son who just entered elementary school run over the house just put him a uniform school "Jason, honey ... let mommy put your clothes on" what the crazy is i try to run to catch him with his clothes in my hands, "Mommy ... mommy ... get me". I stand in the kitchen where he is hiding under the table "Mommy sees you Jason, don't let mommy eat you like a dino" seems like silly scary thing but usually work "Mommy ... dino never eat me, they already died" oh yeah ... please ... if you just know how smart you are why you have run over the house to make me put on your clothes !!!!.

I grab his hands slowly under the table "Come on Jason, wear this" i put on the clothes along with the pants, the color of the uniform is white and green. "Stay here please, i'll bring the shoes okay". For a moment i bring a pair of shoes and tie them "Mommy ... i love you" suddenly he hug me, the most warm thing i ever find this week. He surely can't know what i'm feeling right now. He just 7 years old but he did everything i need "Jason, mommy loves you also"

The sun comes down to my window office, i lay my head to the upper comfort couch and let the report on the table. I could be super woman, i could be squidward on Sponge Bob cartoon nickeledeon who has many hands, i could be bernard bear who always do silly and joking thing just to make me happy, but what is real that i'm a wife with one gorgeous son. I have been married for 8 years. I already havd what all women want, career, married life, happy family, lovely son, good house, nice car and loving husband. What is loose from me ?. I just don't know what has lost. Sometimes i want to get rid for all i have, i just want to go one place where no one knows about me, who i am, where i was from, when i was born, what i do for live, why i have unique taste, and how i through this life. To a place where is really new for me. Stay away from any who close with me but ... how come i leave Jason alone without me ? The son who i adore for, the son who i made many sacrifices in time, effort and pray.

I unlock my cell and start to push the email, there is no new inbox, there are only one sender on the list. Someone who always send and reply my email wherever is, whatever is and however is. Someone who had been my close one since i am single to married person. The deep secret which i never told to anyone. He is ... yes he is a man who is too younger than me. Don't be suspicious that i have an affair with him, it is obviously wrong. I start to read his last email "It is obviously out my mind. You know what ... finally i will marry her". I smiled when re-read his email. They had been dated almost two years not his first girl and will be the last for him. But, why my heart feels worry after received this email. What was wrong with me ?

To Be Continue To Part 2

Idul Adha in Few Places

2010-11-18T08:10:00.001+07:00

Mecca, Saudi Arabia

Mecca, Saudi Arabia- Namira Mosque

Mecca, Saudi Arabia

Arafat Mecca, Saudi Arabia

Pakistan, Islamabad

Yaman

Afganistan, Kabul

Lahore, Pakistan

Gabtoli Market at Dhaka, Banglades

Islamabad, Pakistan

Al-Hamidiyah souk, di Damaskus, Siria

Lahore, Pakistan

Srinagar, India

Baghdad, Irak

Srinagar, India

Taguig, South Manila, Filipina

Namira mosque in Arafat, Mecca-Saudi Arabia

Arafat, Mecca-Saudi Arabia

Kaaba, Mecca-Arab Saudi

on way to Batu.Malang

2010-09-15T18:47:00.001+07:00

Right now,i'm on my way to Malang. One of city at east java island. I'm using train right on Gambir station to Kota Baru station. Wait fab pictures which i visit whenever i reach there. See you.

I Found You

2010-09-07T13:32:00.010+07:00

Love Can Find In Unpredictable Moment

She sipped her coffee and turned her face down. Weary, sad, confuse and afraid. Once again she let her father keep talking on phone "You are my only solution, i really don't know where to ask help. I need that money immediately". 'But the sum of money is too much dad. 20 million ?" her voice lower and deep, she felt faint to realize the number. "Talk to your husband, ask him to lend me. I promise to give back all in short time". The conversation is ended, she is too afraid to talk to her husband. Talk about it seems like try to kill herself slowly.

Next day.

"Did he promise ?" her husband asked for sure "He said so. Can you help him, help me ?" She stared his eyes full of hoping. "If he said so, okay" he moved to small drawer in room, took a account book and gave it to her "Take it from here, the deposit. Make sure he pays it back. The money is belongs to us, our plan to buy a house. Immediately we will leave this apartment. Don't you get it ?'. She nodded don't know to understand or afraid.

A few weeks later.

"Have you called him ?" her husband asked her. "I did, he said next week" she turned her face down and did some core things in room. Try to less her worry. "Next week, and the other weeks. I really bore to hear that. Let me clear this. The money is your responsibility. I won't take over of it. End of this month he must pay it back, nether less ... I don't know what to do".

Her heart racing, her eyes started to wet "Why you talked like that, why you talked like that to my father. Don't you respect him ?" She sit across from him "I tried to respect him. But again and again he never respect me" he walked around her. The selfishness, anger and distrusts covered him. "He never said thank you to me, everything he said -hey, handle this one, take this one, but never and ever he said any thanks to me".

She stood with trembling "You are in million, I never seen any who can talk that harsh to my father in front of my eyes. It's too much". "I feel sorry to you and him of course, but it can change anything". She wiped her tears "Don't worry about the money, I'll pay it by myself".

One week after.

Morning sky looked clear and bright. Today she has a meeting with an important client. She prepared it from night. He wear beige long blazer to knee with brown blouse inside and not less the beige belt with the same fabric with the blazer. She looked stunning.

"Good morning Sir, I'm Aida the secretary of Mr. Albright. He can't come today because he had duty trip. Here this some files which he gave it to me. You can take a look of these" she opened her bag and over him some files. "Thank you Aida, I'm Finn". He opened one by one the paper and sometimes asked some questions to her. The meeting run well, she was glad he could handle the task what her manager gave it to her. "Well, Aida. Can I call you in that way ?", she nodded. "I'm a new comer in this country, so can you give me a favor ?". "What kind of favor Sir ?" asked her. "Have a dinner with me, I feel strange to have dinner by myself. Is it too much ?".

Well, the meeting is already on her task list but, the dinner is out of the list. "It's not on my list Sir, my priority is the meeting". He smiled seems like to tease her but in polite way. "Aida, I’m a good person. Don't you think I'm trying to scam you" he laughed. "No, not in my think. Just ... " she took her fingers grumpily and smiled to him "I already married Sir". Finn laughed more "Dinner and affair is totally different Aida, no more excuse okay. Tonight in Four Season Ballroom, I will book it. I have not much time, next morning my plane is on. I will bring the files which I signed for Mr. Albright"

The night.

Okay, this dinner just to take those files not more. She already told to her husband, Kieran, and the reaction just fine. She wore black long dress, elegant and far from the party gown. Four seasons is the most luxury hotel that she ever knew. She missed the time with Kieran spend few dinner here. Married was not a hell but after the 'money accident' she looked confuse about him, how Kieran can talk that harsh to her father. Her father not a criminal, he must be sure to pay that money back. Each month Aida has to keep some money to pay it back.

"Mr. Finn please" She talked to a receptionist, "Number eight Miss", "Thank you" she smiled and walked to table eight. She gasped, this place is her favorite table with Kieran. "Nice to see you come, have a seat Aida. Don't be too formal". She sit and looked fidget to him. "I'm not used to have dinner with any beside my husband". "I try to understand" He smiled and ordered food and light beverages. The food is totally delicious ; shrimp grill with butter potato surround with olive oil. "Here these the files. Please send me an honor to have cooperation with him. So ... do you like the food" asked him. Aida took the files and put it on her lap. "Awesome". "Nice, so … talking about you, what your husband do ?”. “He is a dentist”, “Amazing, do you often to come here?”. She smiled “It’s my favorite place, and right now we sit on my favorite table Sir”

“I can’t come with you to your house, I have many things to do. You can go by your own. Take taxi with you, here the money”. “But you promised to drive me go there” she talked to Kieran. “And I have told you again and again why you don’t take driver lesson” It is enough, “Okay it’s fine I can go by myself”. Is not about the car, is not about he not come but is all about the way he talked.

Next day.

She received a small present on her desk. “Mr. Albright, do you want me to wrap this to you” Aida called to her manager by phone “No, it’s not for me, but it’s for you”. “From whom ?” she asked confusedly “From Mr Finn. He said, he felt thank for the meeting and especially the dinner”. Slowly she opened the the box, directly she saw beautiful bracelet with small diamond on the center.

Mail by mail she and Finn were connected, started from thank you greeting for the present and more informal mails just to share the lively story. It’s the first time Aida feels have friend beside Kieran, all this time she just think his friend is her husband for one package. But more she realized that she could find someone to share freely without any compromise.

One day her father called again, he needs some money to pay tuition her brother. The project of her father not goal yet. Her father already retired, with some friend he work as project supplier but the money sometimes not good enough to pay tuition her two brothers who still in college. On the other side her husband wants his money back immediately. She totally confused, she has nothing. Even she can’t reach 5 million on her saving. Not once she think to ask money from her husband, is better to lend to bank or other friend. The one precious thing she only has is the diamond bracelet which Finn gave him. She opened her drawer and took it. “I’m sorry, but I have to sell it”

September 2010.

“Here this the money which my father borrowed. Sorry to take it long” She wrote again “I feel sorry to you why you had changed a lot. You never said that harsh to me even to my father before. Once you ask apologize I really can accept and respect for what you did. But more and more I just feel you are not love me as Aida as before. I’m your wife, same like you I need you to appreciate and respect for all I did to you. You had said that you wont any family member involved with us, but I can’t Kieran. My family is everything for me. I love them more than I love my self. I can’t let my family live in lack. If I should choose I better to choose my family. Our marry is nothing if we can’t respect our parents together.

November 2010.

This divorce left pain in my heart, hard to believe her husband asked this divorce and how come she faced this path alone. She waited on the airport about 30 minutes on arrival alley. Her heart raced as long with her pulse. After few months after their first met, she couldn’t imagine how he looked alike. As she saw a tall man with warm smile came over her, she just hug him let all people surrounding them watched. They might be thought they were long distance couple, but they were not. Finn was someone who had been with her when she facing hard time. “I lost my husband and last week I lost my dad, he just said that he can’t let my mother wait that long anymore above there”. They walked slowly “I read your mail, I understand. Don’t you know that you never alone”.

Finn smiled “I want give you an offer”, “What kind an offer Finn ?”, “Tonight, have a dinner with me, lets we start our met like our first date”. Her tears were running “I found someone when I was down, and it was you Finn” she said what he kept since long. “Thank you to come to my dinner invitation that night”. Finn hug her slowly, deep in his heart he want to be with her as long as they could.

New Face

2010-09-07T09:21:00.000+07:00

Well, quite long i don't change my blog looking. So here it is ... no header anymore but full picture of my lovely one animal 'bear'. More simple, warmth and lovely. Hope it will be nutrition my blogging spirit.

Ultrasonography - USG Pregnancy

2010-08-09T15:29:00.001+07:00

it was my first baby when captured in 6 weeks

The mole looked clear, it was amazing creature when a human started from blood

How small but i knew there was a live in there

Next two days, after blooding accident the untrasonography showed the small mole already gone

Good Bye My Litle Baby

2010-08-02T14:03:00.001+07:00

I just lost my baby this morning when the age was 6 weeks old. At first time, i didn't realize my stomach was in pain. I thought it just usual pain in few hours later i saw blood on my panties, i panicked, trembled and confused. What was it ? was i on my menstruation period ? was something wrong in my stomach ? In hurry me and my husband went to Asih Hospital to check it. I still trembled, what happened ? i've got infusion, i felt down, afraid and more i just accepted what would happened.

My husband always hold my hand said that everything just fine don't worry about anything. In my heart i knew that i would lost my baby something whispered in my ears and thought. I think it was a mother instinct.

We stayed at hospital for one night, sometimes i woke up to see my surrounding and looked my husband, i felt sorry to my baby because i couldn't keep it safely. I didn't regret anything but made good lesson to be more carefully next day. I waited the morning to come when the time would told me what exactly happened to my baby.

Next morning, i met my doctor, Amru Harahap, he did diagnose observation to my stomach. Something tools entered to my vagina to see how the baby condition. On screen, i couldn't saw little mole in my ovarium anymore. The baby no longer exist. The baby just gone already passed to heaven exactly when i was in bleeding condition yesterday afternoon. It happened because i was too tired, ya ... i realized i did the same activity as like as i wasn't pregnant. Good bye my baby, even your ages only 6 weeks and the gender not recognized yet, i already put my heart and soul in you. I'm sure God already set another beautiful plans for me and my husband. Mommy loves you and misses you.

2010-06-15T08:29:00.001+07:00

whether

Meet Again After 10 Years Or More

2010-05-26T11:48:00.004+07:00

I can say, it is unbelievable. Suddenly i received an email mid on night from my 1st boyfriend when i was in junior high school. The 1st time i just know how date looks alike. He wrote that he wondered how i am 'cuz he lost my track almost 10 years and more could be. At first time, i didn't realize it is him, but when i saw his full name i was sure that it was him. I felt surprised because of it. Next and more days after that we sent and replied few emails until he asked my number and so did i. The most shock was, last night he called me (he currently in new york) just to tell me that it was his number. I surprised, trembled, laughed and relieved because even we had separate for 10 years and more we still have chance to make a good relationship.

For you, the one who lives there, the person whom i know so spontaneous i want to say thank you to find me, no matter what we had been passed that time, how much i cried because you left me that time, how much pain i kept to move on, but you just make it nice in the end.

Ryza's Forecast for today : "There are many ways to find surprising moments and sometimes it happens not from close surrounding but can come from unpredictable things".

igoogle

2010-04-01T08:00:00.003+07:00

Directly posted from google, it is cool. Just go here and setting your own homepage. You can choose your chosen theme and gadgets. What most fab for me is, recent updates for twitter and blogger. So, why don't you try ?

Cecilia Ahern E-book

2010-03-24T23:53:00.004+07:00

Hellouw...,

I know i am very late to read P.S I love You Novel. I have seen the movie uhm ... not too exciting. But ..., on my last birthday on February, my ass.man gave me that novel for a gift. When i read the 1st chapter i felt overwhelmed-excited. The novel seems nicer than the movie :). Cecilia Ahern is a fresh written, i like the way she describes word by word.

So..., the good news is ... i have some e-book from Cecilia Ahern. Just hit in and save it. See..., how nice i am ?.

Have a holly reading.

Hindu Day of Silence

2010-03-24T09:10:00.005+07:00

The Balinese welcomed Saka New Year which is called a Hindu day of silence well known with Nyepi. The meaning of Nyepi is a day with full of silence and reflect upon their selves. In that day, the Balinese have to stay at home, do meditation, read religion books, and pray. In their homes they are not allow to turn on electricity and fire even hinder to talk to another that could lessen the meaning of Nyepi. In holly of Nyepi day, Hinduism do fasting which start before the sun rises until the sun sets.
A day before Nyepi, Hinduism who are spread all over Indonesia especially Jakarta held parade tradition ceremony ‘Ogoh-Ogoh’. Ogoh-ogah is a creature like a giant doll symbolized evil spirit that can disturb Hindu people to celebrate Saka New Year.

A Balinese man waiting sun sets

Ogoh-Ogoh parade in Denpasar, Bali

Ogoh-Ogoh parade in Jakarta

Happy Birthday

2010-01-28T20:12:00.003+07:00

Happy Birthday, here this a blackforest cake which i made for you. Hope you like it.

Words At Late

2010-01-13T22:14:00.004+07:00

What comes after midle 20s ?. I feel nothing after through 25 except strugle for life. Sometimes want to relieve for being sorry for myself, but i realize it just waste my time. I have to be thankful for what i have, beside me-around me, many lack condition are far from me. I can say, i still better.

Hard to believe my single day will end soon. This year i will marry with someone who i know about 7 years. That is not a short time, but many things still miss to learn each other. I will be a mother somehow no matter the condition is i will be truly a woman. Being the most respectful creature in world-MOTHER-.

Hand Made-Recycled Card

2010-01-10T20:16:00.006+07:00

My hands felt itchy whenever i saw these recycled material which kept in my drawer quite long. In 15 minutes, here this simple card that i made.

Fight for Women

2009-12-01T22:43:00.005+07:00

I love Oprah, because she is the one who always fight to women ; independence, freedom, right, ability, welfare and off course safety. I visit her website regularly and always find fabulous - awesome inside.

Hardly to imagine Oprah will end her show in 2012, i am sure she has own reason to quit from Oprah Show and begin to air Oprah Channel TV herself.

This article open my mind that somewhere in our world there are women who still fight to live from abuse, sex trafficking, rape, racism, slavery, lack of knowledge, in-welfare and many many the others things which hard to write one by one.

I am lucky to be born as woman, i am gratefull someday i will be a mother, i am happy to feel tummy sick each month for my PMS, and i am happy to a quote "wherever you want to find heaven, it is placed under you mother's feet".

Women around the world don't need handouts. They need handups. How small loans can help women everywhere stand on their own.

At the peak of the transatlantic slave trade, 80,000 slaves were transported from Africa to the new world. Today, more than 10 times as many women are being forced into brothels or other forms of slavery.

In places like the Congo, rape is used as a weapon to destroy women's lives, as victims are often made outcasts by their communities and struggle to survive.

In many parts of the world, getting pregnant is the most dangerous thing a woman can do. In fact, a woman dies from pregnancy and labor every minute—the equivalent of five jumbo jets of women dying every day.

When just one girl is educated, she shares what she knows with the community. When a community knows better, they do better. You can be the key that unlocks the hidden potential.

Cartoon Time

2009-12-01T22:21:00.006+07:00

Well ... Well ... it has been so long :) i know ... i know ...

So, let me start with easy post to re-fresh and re-gain my soul to fill my blog. And please, let me say this for myself " Happy Blogging AGAIN Ryza :) "

It is not my intention for absence in posting, i just lost for big space what is named 'imagination' and 'inspiration'. Then, here i am ... and i hope the aura around still support me to keep posting.

Halloween @_@

2009-10-29T10:10:00.012+07:00

Dropping The Tears

2009-10-18T20:39:00.010+07:00

song of the day [embeed&download]

"Do you want to do something crazy ?" she smiles, let her fingers open widely to reach his fingers "Do you want to die together ?" she waits for another fingers reach hers. She closes her eyes, no matter what she will not move, her legs will be stiff and strict as like as a stone. It is not suicide, it is not regret, it is not lost mind, it just relieve. She stands at center on road, she let everything is free this moment. Dim light of a car fade her eyes, but she just ignored it. One ... the car still run toward her, two ... she still close her eyes, three ... she is ready to die.

Her fingers not cold as before, there is one person walks toward her slowly but surely to reach those fingers "Don't leave me ... lets we die together" he hugs her deeply. The dim light turn off "Hey you two ..., are you nuts ? move away, please find another place to take suicide !!!!!" the driver shouted as barked to them.

The girl opens her eyes "Don't you see, even God not let us to die in this way" the tears turns slowly over her cheek "Should we find another way to die ? i can't bare this anymore".

#####

This love is called pain. Pain to pretend that there is no love between them. Emily is an ordinary girl who work as pianist at the famous cafe in town. Bi is an extraordinary boy who is famous and completely bright star. Their first met was about one year ago, that time after filmed shoot there were many reporters run toward him. What he thought just private time for his lunch. He opened his bag and took a cap then put on his head, walked slowly to a girl who just out from storage room "I need you hug to cover me from them outside, can you help me ? i'm sure they wont recognize me here" he grabbed Emily's hand then hug her as like as they were a couple who not see for a long time "I wont forget your helping me" whispered him on her ear.

The day after, Emily received a bouquet of yellow rose on her piano "Thank you -Bi-" it was written from Bi for her, A famous movie star just gave her yellow rose ? it was nonsense. At first time, emily didn't pay attention for it, but more after she felt something different whenever she found Bi in Cafe to watch her played piano every night.

#####

"Get well soon K, i miss you" slowly tears are down. A person that she loves just lie for almost 6 months because fire accident, he being hospitalized because Emily. He runs into fire to save her, Emily is safe but her parents and brother died. K is not die yet, but he can't move, can't talk even open his eyes. K is a person who always beside her, a person who always guard her, a person who substitute as father - mother and brother because she is an orphan right now, a person who loves her all heart and sincere. It is her first love. His name is just K, he always be on top list in everything because his short name, Emily smiles whenever the memories remain back about K.

One night, K condition dropped to 40%, all over his body was cold as a die person. Emily ruined into bare time to wait K all night, waited the ICU room door opened and the doctor would tell her that everything was fine. She stood on her knee hours and hours in the corner, shaked, cried and afraid, all she knew if K died she would have no one in this world.

"Is okay Em" Suddenly Bi came and hug her from back. She knew for sure, she felt relieved that Bi was there that night not because she needed a friend but Bi has took half of her heart.

#####

Is it wrong to let this feeling grow ? Is it wrong to let this feeling become deep love ? It is different, very different. This feeling toward Bi is different than K. How come she become heartless person like this ? K is there right on hospital force to die and live but how come she let herself fall into Bi ?. Many thought roll over in mind.

Tonight the temperature is lower, she can't walk anymore but she have to keep walking to move away those thought. Emily doesn't recognize that Bi follows her. At once she falls, her feet feel heavy, the cold wraps her as like as ice cube, her heart feels weary because guilty, her tears never stop and she falls again. Just let fall and silent "I'm sorry K, i'm sorry ...". Bi walks slowly to reach her "You must be tired, how come a girl can walk that far in this stupid cold, come ... lets we eat some soup and hot chocolate" Bi tries to make her stand and walk, but Emily again and again refuse it. "Leave me Bi, don't you see ... you are worthless in here", "Come ... do you want to stay in here all night ?" he sees her tears start over down again. "I will if i want, what is you intention follow me until this far ? what is your purpose to tutor me like this ? i'm not yours ... don't you see i have K there, why you always around me ? leave me Bi ... i said leave me ... don't you understand ? don't you hear ... leave me Bi, forget everything ... just leave me" her voice is in deep sorrow.

Bi grabs Emily hand, hold her tightly and put her on his back "Are you deaf ? let me down" again and again Emily shouted to Bi but not a single word out from his mouth. That night he take Emily with him.

#####

Even the cafe nearly closed, but Bi is still there listening Emily play the piano. The last guest give an applause for Emily playing and please to go home. Emily still seat in her seat as like as Bi. It is love that he never said, it is love that he never had, it is love that should not keep. Everyone is pleased going home, the lamp just turn off, what is left just Bi and Emily. Bi put off his cap and glasses walking near to Emily. "I will take you home" he smiles and walks toward the door. "Bi ..., K will be out from hospital tomorrow, i decided to live with him ... marry him" her voice blends into sorrow and weary. "Have you taken all you things, i will take you home" seems like Bi wont listen everything on it. Bi keep walking toward the door while Emily walked back from him. Bi turns the door "I am sorry Bi ... " Emily hugs him "I can't leave K, I'm sorry .... we are not fate belong together. I'm sorry Bi ... Lets we pretend we never met before ... " Bi turns, sees Emily in sorrow, he is crying, there are many word which he wants to talk but seems blur at first. Bi kisses Emily gently and become deeply "I love you Em". Emily let herself going with that kiss, even she knows it will make them more pain after this. Emily takes Bi hands, takes him with her, for this night, only this night, let he becomes mine just tonight.

The girl opens her eyes "Don't you see, even God not let us to die together" the tears turns slowly over her cheek "Should we find another way to die ?, i can't bare this anymore"

#####

After K out from hospital, Emily married with K. K still can't talk, need wheelchair to walk but he can move her body bit by bit. Emily let her love to Bi keep in heart.

"Be strong K" she smiles to K. All she needs is K strength to keep alive. She holds his hand while she is sleeping. K caress Emily face gently until he sleeps away "Thank you Emily ... please live well okay ... everytime you see mountain that will as high as my love to you, everytime you see sky that will as wide as my love to you, everytime you see ocean that will as deep as my love to you".

In the morning when Emily try to wake K "Good morning K, open your eyes, lets we walk this morning. I will take you to deep pine forest nearby our house, don't you like it ?".

It just word for K, it just something which wont be accomplished because K had passed away last night.

#####

Emily back to town, works again in the same cafe. Day and day she waits to one person, it is Bi. But he never appear even once.

Until one day, "It is very beautiful playing, i had been heard this playing before" a guest told her so. "Thank you, you must be stick customer in here right, i just play this song in here" Emily smiles "And i never published that song into publick before" Emilly adds. "I am not too often come here, even i just know that you are part in this cafe" a guest said so. "Oh really, well ... where you have heard this song before ?". "My patient, he always play this song every night. He said he wanted to hear this song before he sleeps, afraid that he will miss it next morning, no one know how if next morning he will be still alive or no". Emily smiles "Really, i'm glad that i can give your patient that strong. Please send my greeting for him". "I will, but ... how about you come with me to see him. I'm sure your presence will bring more courage for him. Do you want ?". Emily nods "I love to".

#####

It is the same hospital where K did. The same hospital where Bi always beside him whenever she needs power, she needs shoulder to cry on, she needs someone to kill the time and Bi always there ... seems like he always follow her everywhere.

"It is the room, i will take you to see him" the doctor open the door "Wait Doc ... is it okay ? or ... just give this CD to him, i recorded another songs for him, to make him always bear in everything" said Emily. "It's fine, come with me" said the doctor.

The room is so silent, there is only him in this room. "It is out of his habit, listen your song in this time, meanwhile not his sleep time yet" the doctor smiles to Emily.

"Hello ... sir ... how are you ? getting better after last operation ?" asked the doctor

"Getting better Doc", Emily is freezing she really know that voice, that is only one person who has that voice.

"I bring someone to you, i'm sure you'll love it. She is the player of the song that you played every night"

Emily walks slowly toward that person, his head is bold, closer and closer. It is Bi right there, lie on the bed, in sorrow eyes and tears when he sees Emily.

#####

The first met at Cafe exactly not the first time Bi saw Emily. He had seen Emily same day when K being hospitalized. That was love at first time he saw a girl felt lonely, weary, sorrow and lost. He always there because he had to check regularly. Directly Emily gave him strength to keep alive, did his role as famous star, keep away the fact that he is sick. More over Emily left, more over he lost the strength. He didn't have any reason to keep strength, there was no reason for him had to keep alive to next morning if Emily wasn't there.

"Is it cold Bi ?" asked Emily, "No, it is warm, because you are here with me. You are as like as my electric blanket for me". "Are you sure you want to do this crazy things with me Bi ?" asked Emily. "Don't doubt about it. I wait another crazy things to do together" Bi smiles and laughs.

"Bi ... i owe you some words" Emily smiles to Bi, hold him more tight, caress his face, wipe his tears. "What Em ?".

Emily hugs Bi, whispers in his ear "I love you Bi, love you at first time you hug me at the cafe"

They see each other, eye by eye. Smile to smile. They kiss gently, and might be last kiss for them.

Emily takes Bi to her house in village where he and K lived. Take him to deep pine forest where she wanted to take K before he died. They sit together under the pine forest, morning to night, all day. They let their body die in freezing. But they wont let their love die, let this love sprung like seeds.

2009-10-08T12:09:00.005+07:00

This song give me litle 'cure' in fasting today :)

song of the day [embeed&download]

Monday Means Peak Day

2009-09-28T10:32:00.005+07:00

Well, it is Monday and it means working hours will be officially started and the last but not the least throughout this week i have to face crowded, rush and peak road from Monday to Friday :( This morning i took my EPT (English Profeciany Test) result but, the result quite far from i wish even my score was above standard qualification that's why i should grateful whatever is.

Song of the day [embeed&download]

C for Cookies

2009-09-27T08:05:00.005+07:00

There are some cookies which i made for orders, the taste ... really can't say in words :)

Snow Cookies (each cookies mixed with roasted mede peanuts and wrapped with caster sugar which taste cold and icy whenever u bite it)

Stick Cheese Cookies (each cookie, contain rich edam cheese with cheddar cheese on top)
Canary Cookies (100% butter, melt in mouth with canary and sugar on top)

Pineapple Cookies (each cookie has sweet and juicy pineapple on the centre with cheddar cheese on top)

Chocolate Cookies (100% cocoa powder and bit choco pasta, met in mouth and choco chips on top)

My Passion For Blogginf Just Back

2009-09-27T07:25:00.006+07:00

What a lovely morning, i woke in beautiful Sunday morning with strong blogging passion. I have been waited this moment since long. there must be disturbed thing whenever i want to post my written here. But now this morning, seems all the disturbing things are put away for a moment :). I will start my passion to put my song of the day, please note ... lately i like to put a song which i called favorite song of the day :), i think Korean wave had been wind me from few years back, the 1st Korean drama i ever seen is Goong, The Palace. Started from that drama i was already fall in love with hallyu (Korean actors and artists) and Korean wave. Today, the lately Korean drama I'm watching is My Fair Lady, Please Take Care My Lady.

Good morning Ryza ..., please enjoy your last holiday.

Song of the day [embeed&download]

Just Let Go, Let In, It Will Be New Start

2009-09-26T09:18:00.008+07:00

What a day, well, i just can say ... it will be a new start for me ... no matter what later all i have to do just face the day and the other days after through this Saturday. Aza ... fighting ... Ryza :)

Song of the day [embeed&download]

September, September The Day Is September :)

2009-09-26T07:11:00.003+07:00

Well, this must be song of the month, because not only the title is 'September' but also the material its contain cherful meaning :)
<a href="http://listenandlearn.bandcamp.com/track/september-2">September by Listen &amp Learn Music</a>

A for Amazing

2009-09-22T00:05:00.005+07:00

Wow..., it has been quite long i didn't write any post since last August. I think it was nearly a month, phew ... There are some reasons which i want to share with you, readers. The 1st is i really have least time to post any written because i used to come home late from office last August. The 2nd is In September, me as a Muslim, went through fasting month for a month when ended on September 20, 2009. The 3rd is i received many orders for Idul Fitri's cookies, that time i used to make cookies right after reached at home until 1 am in the morning, you could say i just slept for 3 hours more and less because on 4 am i have to wake up to perform sahur (in Muslim mean eat in dawn to start fasting in a day). So here i am now, enjoying my Idul Fitri day off which is the longest holiday i always have.

I took short video whenever i broke my fasting gathered with my friends in Grand Indonesia. There was a beautiful and a amazing the other art of water. Please take a look at this.

Note : It will be shown every one hour and at the end there will be many bubbles soap fall around you, is it cool right ?

Have You Seen A Recycle House ?

2009-09-03T09:35:00.023+07:00

The other side of me is like to see and explore about housing and gardening. Until i found this article which shocked me, the first question was how come this house built ? what kind of things and ornaments that filled this house ?.

This person i'm sure must be a creative person, start from the floor, the roof, until tiny ornaments are made from recycle things. Used botle, cattle bones, piece of glass, old frame, and many many others. Have enjoy to see the faboulus recycled house.

About 12 years ago, Dan Phillips started Phoenix Commotion, a construction business in his hometown, Huntsville, Tex., where he builds low-income housing out of salvaged items.

So far, he has built 14 homes on lots either purchased or received as a donation. A self-taught carpenter, electrician and plumber, Mr. Phillips said 80 percent of the materials are salvaged from other construction projects, hauled out of trash heaps or just picked up from the side of the road.

Salvaged wine corks, which are easy to come by, provide an inexpensive form of cork flooring. "We have some heavy drinkers in town," Mr. Phillips said.

The bases of wine bottles function like stained glass on the top of a Dutch door.

Mr. Phillips created a counter out of slices of osage orange wood, a ubiquitous material in East Texas that many builders find difficult to use.

At left, the osage orange wood is used as railing.

Mr. Phillips's houses use scrap wood for siding. City officials worked closely with him to set up a recycled building materials warehouse where builders, demolition crews and building product manufacturers can drop off items rather than throwing them in a landfill.

Thousands of picture frame corners were used to create the ceiling at left. Mr. Phillips said, "A frame shop was getting rid of old samples and I was there waiting."

A wood-burning stove from an old ship found a new home in Mr. Phillips's "tree house."

Kristie Stevens rents one of Mr. Phillips's houses. She is working with him on building a house of her own nearby, since Mr. Phillips requires the eventual owner of a house to help with its construction.

"If the walls are wonky, it will be my fault but also my pride," she said

A chair's back is fashioned out of cattle bones

Cattle bones are also used to form address numbers.

Mr. Phillips oversees employees building a house. "I think mobile homes are a blight on the planet," he said. "Attractive, affordable housing is possible and I'm out to prove it."

One worker, Tom McKinney, applies mirror shards to a wall.

Broken tiles are brought together to make up a bathroom floor

Mr. Phillips used old shingles, arranged by color, to build the roof of what he calls "the storybook house."

"You can't defy the laws of physics or building codes," Mr. Phillips said, "but beyond that, the possibilities are endless."

Cultural Festival

2009-08-19T13:13:00.008+07:00

Each August 17, we celebrate our independence day and this year in 2009 Indonesia had been 64 years old. In 1945 we conquered our enemy -Japan and Netherlands- that time our president Soekarno and Vice President M. Hatta declared Independence of Indonesia, vanished all slavery and colonization especially from Japan and Netherlands. There are many ways to celebrate our independence from formal ceremonial, games, bazaar, festival and the others. Such as Cultural Festival that held on August 18, 2009 right on National Monument.

Cookies For Baazar

2009-08-17T08:27:00.016+07:00

Kastengel (Edam Cheese Cookies)

Chocolate Stick

Chocolate Chips

Praline Chocolate

Last Friday to Saturday, i made some cookies :) well ... well, i know Idul Fitri not coming that fast but, my BF asked me to make kastengel, various chocolate stick, dark chocolate chip, and praline chocolate. All those things will put on his bazaar which held on Tuesday this week right on his office. After wrapped it i hope my cookies willl be sold out :)

Another Blog

2009-08-11T10:53:00.003+07:00

Well ... finally, after reconsider few things, i had made another blog account on wordpress. Anytime you, reader, have free time please welcome to this link At 1st, i have to learn a lot about this new thing, but more and more i started to kick it :).

And ... the most important thing is "Don't worry, this blogspot still active. I'll post the article like i used to".

Come and look my wordpress.

Note : This official blog on blogspot will always be fresh and so do my blog on wordpress

Myths But Sometimes Prooven

2009-08-06T09:41:00.003+07:00

Chocolate
Grandma's wisdom: Chocolate gives you pimples.
Science says: Not quite. Chocolate bars might trigger an acne flare-up, but if so, the culprit is probably the sugar, milk, and gooey fillings, not the cocoa.

Apple
Grandma's wisdom: An apple a day keeps the doctor away.
Science says: Granny's overstating this fruit's potency. Still, the peel is a good source of quercetin, an important antioxidant that, studies suggest, helps lower blood pressure, fight asthma and allergies, and prevent heart attacks.

Hair
Grandma's wisdom: If you go out with wet hair, you'll catch a cold.
Science says: Maybe. Some research indicates (but doesn't prove) that a wet head helps cold viruses take hold, by tightening blood vessels in the nose and making it harder for white blood cells to reach the viruses and fight them off.

Air Conditioning
Grandma's wisdom: Sleeping in air-conditioning can give you a chill.
Science says: She may be onto something. Air conditioners dry out the protective layer of mucus along nasal passages, which likely allows viruses to infect you more easily. Viruses reproduce faster inside a cold nose too.

Butter
Grandma's wisdom: Put butter on a burn.
Science says: No. There's no evidence of a benefit from butter.

Honey
Grandma's wisdom: Honey speeds healing.
Science says: Yes. Mild to moderate burns (but not other types of wounds) heal faster if you spread honey on them -- maybe because it creates a moist, antibacterial environment that promotes tissue growth.

Swimming
Grandma's wisdom: Swimming after eating can lead to cramps and drowning.
Science says: Not exactly, but not completely wrong either. After you eat, blood gets shunted to your digestive tract and away from exercising muscles. That can lead to a buildup of lactic acid in your muscles, so swimming a few laps too soon after lunch could cause a sudden (though not fatal) cramp.

Ginger
Grandma's wisdom: Ginger is good for upset stomachs.
Science says: Yes. Good evidence shows ginger reduces nausea.

At 1st As Penpal At Last Being Partner In Life

2009-08-05T09:14:00.009+07:00

Whenever i read this story, my heart thrilled ... then wondered ... how if that happened to me, what would i do ?. 19 years are really not long period as i know and surely you know also. It is not an issue that love can come into many ways. Love never can't read in logic and can't realize when it starts. I believe people who have faith like this will always tie up til end. Congrat for you two ... and i hope people out there who still be alone keep their big heart that love will find you whatever, whenever, however, and wherever you are.

Jaime Benefit and Jeremy Clayton met as pen pals during the 1991 Persian Gulf War.

It started with a letter - and ended in a wedding.
Nearly two decades ago, 13-year-old Jaime Benefit wrote a letter addressed to "Any Soldier" during the Persian Gulf War, expressing her support for the troops as they prepared to invade Iraq.
The letter made its way to Pfc. Jeremy Clayton, a 19-year-old soldier from Charleston, S.C., who was serving with the 3rd Armored Cavalry Regiment.
The two became pen pals, writing back and forth about sports, high school and their families.
"Just stuff to keep their minds off of what was going on and keep their spirits up," said Benefit, 32.
After the war ended, the two stopped writing, but Benefit always wondered what happened to Clayton.
"I'd always kept his letters," she said. "I had them wrapped in a red-white-and-blue ribbon."
Earlier this year, she searched his name on Facebook and sent him a short note: "Were you in Desert Storm?"
Clayton, 38, now out of the Army, saw the message and had one reaction: "Shock and awe."
"I just knew I had to find out what she was doing," he recalled.
The two agreed to meet in March, and their fate was sealed.
"It took my breath," Clayton said of seeing his one-time pen pal in the flesh. "I was actually shaking and I'm a pretty strong man. I just said to myself, 'You have to do whatever you can to make sure you spend the rest of your life with this woman.'"
Clayton proposed not long after, and the two got married July 15 in a simple ceremony on the beach in Charleston.
"It was fate that I got her letter," he said. "And her finding me 19 years later was fate."
The Internet may have brought the newlyweds together, but they still rely on good old pen and paper to keep their bond strong.
"She writes me notes every morning and puts them in my lunch," he said.

All You Need for Your Eyebrows

2009-08-01T09:33:00.017+07:00

I'm absolutely agree with this. What are things can make your face different and make over ? 1st : your cut and stylish new hair, 2nd : your new color hair, and 3rd but not the last : your eyebrows shape. Put beside about make up ... everybody knows ... very know make up can trick you to be a beautiful one. But the three things i wrote before was true. Whenever you change your hair and color it you will be a different person so do the the eyebrow shape. This one really can bring something BIG DIFFERENT on your face even your personality. Here these some pictures as proof and can be inspiration for you ... especially for girls :).

Note : I compiled these pictures by using paint.net

Painting Your Room

2009-07-29T23:42:00.004+07:00

Do you think these paintings can run your inspiration and imagination ? Even a room looks small but cuz of painting it will make fabulous one, then a room which is big surely make as like as heaven.

Blogger Buddy on Windows Vista Sidebar

2009-07-28T19:33:00.003+07:00

Well, i just tried to add blogger buddy for my windows vista sidebar. It was fun and totally usefull for me, especially for the addict bogger as like me :). It is my first post directly on my windows sidebar. Totally rock !.
For you who already used Windows Vista Program, visit this link to add your windows vista sidebar. Have enjoy it.

Car Free Day

2009-07-28T02:45:00.005+07:00

Every Sunday in the last week of a month, Jakarta citizen used to celebrate 'Car Free Day'. On July 26, 2009, Hotel Indonesia and Thamrin main street were chosen as place for 'Car Free Day' action. I never wondered before those main street would be no car at all. I always through those main street everytime i head to home and always be completely crowded in working hours home. People gathered and did many action to rejoice 'Car Free Day'. There were so many attraction held such as ondel-ondel, delman and gymnast.

Ondel-ondel as one of genuine traditional culture from Jakarta - Betawi

Delman, one of old transportation which use horse and ride by kusir (a man who run the horse)

Another ondel-ondel pictures

Group of gymnast who rejoice in attraction

Bunderan Hotel Indonesia as one of historical place in main centre of Jakarta

Another gymnast group pictures

Bottled Water

2009-07-23T21:55:00.003+07:00

Not because i am a pisces does mean i like to drink :). If i have to choose tea, coffee, syrup, soda and mineral water i will prefer the mineral water. If i have to choose meat, rice, noodle, fish and vegetables i am surely prefer vegetable but not for last off course i will choose fruit :). Is not about being healthy life or somewhat, even for diet nutrition and others. I like to drink mineral water because that one no-smell and no-color. But, eventually i read one article on yahoo which wrote about bottled water. I had known some helpfull information before i read that. Don't let your bottled water left in car, don't let your bottled water directly interacted with heat and sunlight, just use bottled water for once and so on. But, i never known that bottled water, including the most expensive one still contained bacteria even it stated that 'had sterilized'. Just take a look at this.

Bottled water isn’t always pure
Scan the labels of the leading brands and you see variations on the words “pure” and “natural” and “pristine” over and over again. And when a Cornell University marketing class studied consumer perceptions of bottled water, they found that people thought it was cleaner, with less bacteria. But that may not actually be true. For example, in a 4-year review that included the testing of 1,000 bottles of water, the Natural Resources Defense Council—one the country’s most ardent environmental crusaders—found that “about 22 percent of the brands we tested contained, in at least one sample, chemical contaminants at levels above strict state health limits.”

It’s not clear where the plastic container ends and the drink begins
Turns out, when certain plastics are heated at a high temperature, chemicals from the plastics may leach into container’s contents. So there’s been a flurry of speculation recently as to whether the amounts of these chemicals are actually harmful, and whether this is even a concern when it comes to water bottles—which aren’t likely to be placed in boiling water or even a microwave. While the jury is still out on realistic health ramifications, it seems that, yes, small amounts of chemicals from PET water bottles such as antimony—a semi-metal that’s thought to be toxic in large doses—can accumulate the longer bottled water is stored in a hot environment. Which, of course, is probably a good reason to avoid storing bottled water in your garage for six months—or better yet, to just reach for tap instead.

In my opinion after read this, i think is better to take bottled water that container is a cup from your own kitchen, and it contains a product that has passed strict state, federal and local guidelines for cleanliness and quality. Hey ... don't be paranoia after read this and don't keep any suggestion feeling that bottled water is harmful. I just share my thought, opinion and information that i know. So ... just be carefull.

Bombed in JW Marriot and Ritz Carlton Jakarta

2009-07-19T13:41:00.005+07:00

These are some pictures as proof that terrorism really don't have BRAIN and un-human being. The bombed happeened on Friday morning about 8 am when guest used to have breakfast. What can i say ?. There were some rumors that 'they' (who did bombed) wanted to make Indonesia as like as Iran, 'they' wanted ruined our government into RIS (Revolusionair, Indonesia United) - that meant change into communist one, 'they' wanted to kill our president, and other...other... rumors just make Indonesia going deep and under in fear.

2009-07-17T19:47:00.000+07:00

this condition rarely happened on friday night especially for home working hour at protocol way sudirman-thamrin,there is less crowded when i'm head to home,i wonder what happen?and i realize is all cuz the impact of bombed tragedy that happened last morning.why it has to be happened again?when our politics and economics run quite well so far.i wish for good and hope good image for indonesia back soon.

Off For Temporally

2009-07-13T15:43:00.003+07:00

Start from Sunday to Tuesday (i hope), i am on duty trip outside from Jakarta to finalize financial performance guidance for evaluation purpose. Sorry for inconvenience 'cuz i will be rarely post new topic on my blog. See you soon ... readers :)

One Day In Neverland For Remembrance of Michael Jackson

2009-07-09T07:01:00.020+07:00

Entrance Gate "Welcome to Neverland"

Front view at Neverland Ranch

Long table banquet which put on back main house under a lovely big tree at Neverland Ranch

Two kids bronze statue put on main path to main house at Neverland Ranch

Three kids bronze statue located from main house background

A gift from Elizabeth Taylor which put side from swimming pool at Neverland Ranch

Railway station at Neverland Ranch

Tennis field is located on back from pool house

A bronze statue forward to main road to main house at Neverland Ranch

The three kids fishing statue from backside main house at Neverland Ranch

Spiral stair to up floor and a room in railway station space

The candles hung on to main house entrance at Neverland Ranch

A long coridor with windows side through to main house at Neverland Ranch

Up floor at main house at Neverland Ranch

Inside interior from hidden room with three shelves which used to save Michael's valueable things at Neverland Ranch

Inside interior from pool house, Michael used to fill this space with ding dong games

The big clock hung on railway station at Neverland Ranch

backside of main house at Neverland where Michael used to bath and sleep

Big Day For Indonesia

2009-07-08T05:35:00.004+07:00

Today on July 8,2009 we have important day to show and proof that indonesia is a high democracy country. The president election will held today. There are 3 candidates : mega-prabowo,sby-boediono and jk-wiranto. For me whoever the president later, the most important is they can bring this country into the welfare one. Please vote your voice to change. Directly post on mobile-opera mini.

What Did Hairstylist Say ?

2009-07-06T10:05:00.007+07:00

I like to go to salon to do hairstylist, not only to cut but also to do hair creambath, hair spa, and hair masker. I have wavy hair and again ... again i had tried to straighten my hair with makarizo rebonding or ironing hair tools, but it had been back to the original. Until today, i had tried various hairstyle started from short, middle, and remain long to pony and i think ... i still not find the right style yet for me especially for my round face with my thick cheek. I never know the secret or special ingredients that are contain in their shampoo, conditioner, cream, serum and so on. What the funny is, I always feel GREAT everytime I get out from salon, so … what are their secret ? what are they hide for me, us – as customer ?. When I read this article, it seemed funny things but could be worth information for us. The most important is let the hairdresser know what you exactly want because they have expertise, skill and knowledge in this field, but remember they can offer magic to your hair but they can't spread mantra to your face.

Come at least five minutes early. If you're running late, please call ahead. Show me some basic respect. This is a business, not fun and games
Don't ask me to "squeeze" you in when I'm already booked. I'd be taking time and effort away from other clients. You wouldn't like being treated that way
Hairdresser school does not teach about counter transference, projection, negative reinforcement, or personality disorders. If you're looking for a therapist, all I have is a tail comb and an opinion
Some women think that if they keep their hair all one length the way it was in high school, everyone will think they're still in high school. Guess what? You're not. As you get older, you need to soften the lines around your face. Layers are the magic remedy
Bodies and hair change as hormones change. If your hair is dry, listless, or brittle, or if it's not holding your color or style the way it used to, see a doctor. If your hair isn't over processed, you could be pregnant (surprise!) or menopausal (yes, I can tell)
A trim is not "just" a trim. It requires my expertise, skill, knowledge, and time. Would you say to your dentist, "It's just a tooth," or to your doctor, "It's just a leg"?
That single bill you stuff into the shampoo person's hands isn't doing her any favors. A dollar bill doesn't buy anything anymore. You should tip her at least $3—more if your hair is long
If you want to buy a bottle of color and do your own hair to save a buck, you can live with the consequences
Some clients will say, "Cut my hair just like you did last time." That always baffles me. The average time between appointments is six to eight weeks. I have hundreds of clients. How am I supposed to remember exactly how I did your hair the last time? If you want a carbon copy of a cut and style you loved, take a picture and show me
Why do you think a child's haircut should cost less than yours? Kids don't sit still. Kids kick. It's an intense experience
Standing all day and using scissors and a blow-dryer takes its toll—I have arthritis in my fingers, calcium deposits in my wrist, and 10 percent less hearing than I used to. I am a physical wreck
We see women at their worst. Their hair is wet, they have foils on their hair, they have no makeup on. There's nothing for them to hide behind. So they tell us everything. The truth is, I really don't care what they do sexually. I'm only interested in their hair

Here these some pictures that i took from haircut makeover on oprah winfrey show

They Are Made From 100% Soap

2009-07-01T09:34:00.002+07:00

The Nanny Film Series To Watch Free Online

2009-06-27T19:19:00.008+07:00

Oh ... i really love this film series. This film was taken 7 season, first started on November 3, 1993 to December 6, 20004. Can you believe that 7 season ???? Gosh ... really take their live ever :). I remembered when i was kid about elementary aged, i stunned front of tv to watch the nanny and forgot all things, i repeat okay, forgot all things just for watching that film. Couldn't hard waited the nanny aired on tv. I just miss the nanny film, try to search all the seasons into dvds but still can't find yet. But ..., once again, But ... i found this link ... wow ... hardly believed this, i found all the episodes started from 1st season to 6th season. Thanked to vidstv and youtube in the name of crywishes.

This is the short about the nanny :

Fran (Fran Drescher), fresh out of her job as a bridal consultant in her boyfriend's shop, first appeared on the doorstep of Broadway producer Maxwell Sheffield (Charles Shaughnessy) peddling cosmetics, and quickly stumbled upon the opportunity to become The Nanny for his three children. But soon Fran, with her offbeat nurturing and no-nonsense honesty, touched Maxwell as well as the kids.

And, after five years of blue collar meets blue blood, as Fran gave Maxwell and his children a healthy dose of "Queen's logic," she won her way into the heart of prim and proper Maxwell and he finally made the flashy girl from Flushing his bride.

Now that Fran is the lady of the manor, her influence over the three children, though not always what their father expects, continues to flourish. Together she and Maxwell, as husband and wife, will nurture Maggie (Nicholle Tom), who has blossomed from a shy, awkward teenager into a confident young woman; Brighton (Benjamin Salisbury) a teenager who is discovering girls and just a little obsessed with his trust fund; and Grace (Madeline Zima) who no longer needs her therapist for guidance now that she has Fran.
Proudly running the Sheffield household is the butler, Niles (Daniel Davis), who watches all events with a bemused eye and levels problems with his quick wit. Niles quickly saw that Fran was the best thing to walk through the mansion door and was even more excited about her wedding day than the bride-to-be. Maxwell's business partner, C.C. Babcock (Lauren Lane), who for years had her eye on the eligible Maxwell, has, in her moments of inconsolable jealousy, turned her affections on Niles, not unsuccessfully, either.

Along with marrying Fran, Maxwell must contend with Fran's ravenous mother, Sylvia (Renee Taylor), who has given herself free access to the Sheffield household and has guided, and misguided, her daughter over many a piece of coffee cake at the Sheffield's kitchen table. Val (Rachel Chagall), Fran's best friend, gives advice which makes Fran's logic seem like the Theory of Relativity. And Yetta (Ann Guilbert), Fran's grandmother, offers up her own anecdotes which often leaves others speechless.

And once again, here this the link to watch all 6 seasons : http://vids.tv/The-Nanny/tv

The nanny is always be my favourite family-romantic-comedy film series. Happy watching !

Honestly, They Are Suffered In Their Sanctuary

2009-06-24T09:04:00.019+07:00

Even animal know how to show their feeling after long time separated. It was not an big issue but they showed to us that animal have feeling as like as human. I like to watch circus meanwhile when i was kid i liked to go to zoo, but i never knew they suffered. They have right to live like us in harmony, peace, save and perfect environment.

Two abused elephants, Shirley and Jenny are reunited after 23 years, and their joy is trumpeted throughout the colony.

Elephants relax in the the shade on a hot day. The savanna-like plains of the sanctuary in Tennessee is a perfect environment for elephants. At the 2,700-acre preserve, the 19 African and Asian elephants in residence are allowed to exist as they would in the wild.

In a sweetly affectionate gesture, Shirley and Bunny hold trunks.

The elephants at Carol Buckley's sanctuary live -- and die -- on their own terms.

How Mangnificent The Hands Are

2009-06-23T07:49:00.009+07:00

Art will not touch limit. There are many objects can use as media, such as HANDS. I followed reader's digest on twitter and about few minutes ago i reached the latest info about this art. What can i say ? this is really brilliant idea. You really have to see this !

When Italian artist Guido Daniele was hired by an advertising agency to create body painting of animals, he loved the idea. "I researched each animal in depth to see how I could transfer it to a hand, and then set about bringing it to life."

The cheetah, Daniele's first painting, is still his favorite. "It turned out perfectly the first time and gave me the courage to complete the rest of the set."

Daniele says his daughter, Ginevra, 22, and son Michael James, 15, proved to be his best canvases. "If you're spending hours on end holding someone's hand, I'd rather it be the hand of someone I love. There's nothing worse than working with a nervous, unfamiliar model whose hands are shaking."

Daniele's paintings take an average of three to four hours to complete.

The first time Daniele painted the eagle with outstretched wings it took him ten hours to finish.

Daniele now has grand designs for a horse, a panda and a snake, all for his personal portfolio.

The hardest part of his job is watching his creations disappear down the drain after they're photographed. "I'm getting used to it," Daniele shrugs. "At least I get to start each day with a fresh canvas."

Bittersweet

2009-06-22T09:33:00.001+07:00

I never found how miracle and lucky came in me. I believe God is exist and there for human. I have religion as belief and guidance to do good things and hinder bad things in life.

As human I know and admit that I have much sins, because human have two faces ‘the good side’ and ‘the bad side’. I won’ t be a naïf person to say that I am pure as white.

I never tried to be a best in many things. Society, education, job and so on. I never wanted to be a best person. I never dreamt, hope even wish to be a best one. Is it wrong ? meanwhile in this world – throughout the world - almost want to be a best.

Even lately seems like I try to hinder any hope and wish because I know how nice my hope and wish are I never reached one even the little tiny one.

I have to do hard in all things for what I want. How struggle the effort was, in that time I never found the luck and miracle factors.

What the most wrong in me that always no chance.

I am too tired to move on but I have keep moving even is useless. Being stand on day by day is just enough for me.

It Seems Great House But In Dreadful Location

2009-06-19T09:49:00.020+07:00

I never believed there were some houses to live in dreadful and terrible places but have worthy prices. At first, i saw this article in yahoo buz and linked it to New York Times.

The morale i could take after read it was wherever, whatever and however the houses people would do anything to make their houses fitting with their own until reach to the top convenience and off course money couldn't count in.

Gwynn Griffith lives in a former shoe factory in a section of San Antonio where it is not uncommon to hear gunshots at night.
Real estate agents warn against buying a great house in a bad location, but it is a way for buyers to get some of what they want without spending a fortune.

Ms. Griffith's home is a 16,000-square-foot building, a former shoe manufacturing plant built in the 1800s. When she first saw the property, there were old boats and rusted cars in the yard, pigeons roosting indoors and a resident colony of bats.

A building in disrepair, near the Griffith home in San Antonio. Ms. Griffith has made sure several family and living rooms are in her house. A decorator with an opulent flair, Ms. Griffith has spent $400,000 creating a lavish space that conjures a ruined European castle.

Many rooms inside Ms. Griffith's house have a theme with paintings, sculptures, books or furniture. Like many people who own houses where the location is unlikely to improve, Ms. Griffith may never see a return on her investment.

A freight train passes a few feet from Kathleen Hulser's 1839 summer house in Connecticut. She's willing to live with that because it helped her buy the house at a lower price.

David Evans and his partner, Jorge Ruiz, antiques dealers in the small Lowcountry town of Walterboro, S.C., say they could never have afforded this farmhouse had it been in a better location. When the challenging location and troubled economy drove down the seller's asking price from $296,000 to $170,000, the home was finally within reach, and a few months ago, the couple bought it. A similar house would cost 35 percent more in a different location, according to the broker who sold them the house.

The Evans/Ruiz house is just across the street from a former liquor store/gas station/fireworks stand. Without the spark plugs, windshield wipers and rotting transoms that dot his garden-and the trailer park and an abandoned gas station as neighbors -- Mr. Evans and Mr. Ruiz say they could never have afforded the area's oldest farmhouse.

Houses like the Evans/Ruiz house are charming and often historic, but bargains because of their blighted neighborhoods or undesirable locations.
The breakfast room in the Evans/Ruiz house.
Anne Troutman and Aleks Istanbulu turned this old Santa Monica church into their home, paying a third less than the asking price in part because a nearby community center attracts substance abusers who sometimes end up on their yard.
At just over $1 million the Santa Monica house wasn't cheap, but many comparable area homes are currently listed at more than double that price.
When her husband told her of a crumbling 1901 Federal-style mansion for sale in an unsafe part of the Bronx, Eridania Diaz knew she had to have it, even though the house sits among boarded-up buildings and empty lots.
Ms. Diaz paid $350,000 for the 10-room house in 2004. It cost about that much to haul away more than 10 tons of trash and remodel and install surveillance cameras and alarms.
The house is in Highbridge, which borders Yankee Stadium and ranks among New York City's most unsafe areas, according to statistics from the New York Police Department.
Though she said she loves the house, Ms. Diaz, who is a landlord, recently put it on the market because she said that economic troubles had left many of her tenants unable to pay their rent, which has reduced her income. She said she plans to move into a similar antique house a few streets away if she sells the property.

Bali Art Festival

2009-06-17T11:40:00.013+07:00

Bali Art Festival began on June 13, 2009 in Denpasar. Annual festival will held in a month and will show exhibition and traditional culture attraction from Bali or throughout the world.

The Balinese men wore traditional clothes with bringing unbrella in opening Bali Art Festival at Denpasar, Bali

The Balinese women wore traditional clothes with bringing tribute things for God in opening Bali Arts Festival at Denpasar, Bali.

The balinese dancers in opening Bali Arts Festival at Denpasar, Bali.

mobile blog

2009-06-14T00:51:00.000+07:00

it is my 1st time i do mobile blog,my comment is...FUN.

Heart

2009-06-12T21:26:00.006+07:00

One, which always had been with me since long is 'heart'. It had been through so many phases and i know the phase will not end until the world finish. Sometimes, i had done many things that make it had felt weary because of pain but many things it had felt relieved when i had been in happiness. It had been more my strength but it had been my soul. I know and i am sure we can go through.

I am glad to have you girlsz

2009-06-11T21:22:00.010+07:00

Everyone had changed 'cuz of new culture and sometimes he or she had forgotten what he or she had on past. I never wanted to be a best person, but i had always tried to be a grateful person. Girls ... Mila and Uti, i know ... very know ... that life is too hard to face but we already grew up. We hadn't been as the seventeen girls as before, but all i had been sure since last met that we had been tough because our past. Love and pain are created as pair and we had known that.

Cats and Dogs

2009-06-09T20:16:00.007+07:00

Oo0h ... so lovely and sweet ... :)

Exotic Escapes

2009-05-31T12:11:00.014+07:00

Exotic places to escape ... wow ... so fabulous. What i most to do is just ESCAPE. When i stopped by to Oprah , i saw this article to lure ourself to escape in exotic places. Even hard to grant one of these places, but i could find another places to escape. If i have to choose, i will chose dive with sharks. The More risky the more i like :).

Swim with Jellyfish

Sometimes, you just need to get away—far, far away. These unique travel destinations will open a new world of exploration and adventure! Take a trip to the Rock Islands for a cool dip with the golden jellyfish. and have lost their stinging ability, so tourists can enjoy swimming with the creatures up close and personal. Located in the Pacific island of Palau, Jellyfish Lake is a completely landlocked saltwater lake that used to have an output to the ocean. Today, the jellyfish that live there feed on algae

Try Spelunking
Showering waterfalls, caves and slides will challenge you as you climb and explore the canyons of New Zealand. Leap from a subterranean waterfall and try your skills at "black-water rafting" as you take in all the adventures the country has to offer.

Bunk in an Igloo
From Sweden to Canada to Finland, ice hotels are popping up in locations across the globe. The unique hotels, which melt every year and are rebuilt the next season, offer walls and fixtures made entirely of ice. Most are furnished with amenities like artic sleeping bags, meals prepared over an open fire, reindeer parks and even chapels. The fact that the hotels melt each year means that the architecture of each space is constantly changing.

Dive with Sharks
If lying on the beach with a book sounds like a bore, why not spend your vacation face to face with a 2,700 pound shark? Check out Shark Alley off of Dyer Island in South Africa, a breeding ground for whales, dolphins and a plethora of sharks. Instructors assist you as you deep-sea dive—while safely inside a cage—with Great Whites. Remember: This is an activity to do with professionals only.

Lodge in a Treehouse
Relive your childhood—with or without your kids—by sleeping among the exotic birds and monkeys in a "treesort." You can visit destinations like Brazil, Costa Rica and Turkey to take in their spectacular scenery while staying right in the forest. Many treehouse hotels offer accommodations like thatched roofs, suspended walkways, steel-cable bridges and leaf-covered showers. Each house usually sleeps two to six people.

Take a Dip in Geothermal Seawater
Bathe and relax in the Blue Lagoon in southwestern Iceland, a geothermic destination spa filled with over 6 million liters of perfectly hot seawater (the average temperature is a Jacuzzi-like 104 degrees). The lagoon is known for its healing power and unique active mineral ingredients that cleanse and refresh the skin, making this a hot spot for those who want to pamper themselves.

Cave Tubing
Go cave tubing in Belize! Begin your adventure by trekking through the breathtaking nature trails in the Belizean rainforest. Explore beautiful dry caves and the Maya underworld when you float on a rubber inner tube through the formations of the Caves Branch River.

Audible Book For Free Download

2009-05-26T08:31:00.003+07:00

For all of you who like to read this is the other way to satisfy your desire in reading 'Audible'. I found the fabulous site to download Audible Books For Free HERE. LibriVox provides free audio books from the public domain. There are several options for listening. The first step is to get the mp3 or open to save the files into your own computer. You will find vary book catalog there. Have enjoy it.