I miss my dream, i cry whenever miss him badly like this. Why my heart loves him that much, even i never know how inside his heart right now. Everything has chamge, should i stay same or should i go.  All his words remain to his eyes, something which i never seen again. Longing his warm which no longer mine. I am speechless, more i write more i cry this time.

11 pm, coming to midnight and i still awake. What is my dream doing this time ? My dream, i am missing you. My days passed so hard, i just need his hug. I lost words ...

So late this time, 2 am and I still awake. My mind running wild, it should be my dream only in mind. I just think, will he always be with me ? How if he go and leave me like he did 2 to 3 years a go, will it happen ?

My dream and his wife have many good times together, I believe she cares and loves my dream. One day, they will have one, or maybe two or maybe twin or maybe three or many kids which colour they married life. In that time ... will my dream still with me ? in that time will I still have place in his life ?

My dream, no one will know who what and how I am in your life. There is only one person who I call my dream, and is you. No one even times could change it. My dream own his place in mine.

I always to wake up in middle of nigh like right now. 2 pm this time. Only my dream who always come in mind. Somehow, I want my dream hug me until I sleep again. I am missing him. My dream, have you ever think to leave me again ?

Tonight I am wearing the sleeping dress you had given me few years ago. I still wearing it in times missing my dream badly. Somehow I could feel my dream hug me while I am sleeping. Still fit with me, I still have the same size and weight. My dream exactly know my size. My dream exactly know me inside and outside ... all ... about me. Until the intimate to privacy things he had known all. As if he was here besides me, I would cuddle as like as a kid inside his hug. He knows how spoil I am to him. Good night my dream ... missing you badly.