Khansa is sleeping so tight. She is the only one reason I still here, in this house. She says "bunda, why you crying" I just shake my head show to her no. She hugs me but just make me cry more. My mother, my dream and my illness are the reason of my tears. Allah knows better what I feel and through. 

 

Lately I got some ordered for snack meeting in some offices. Beginning from 5, 20, and yesterday I got 250 boxes ordered. I didnt sleep all day then I got headache at last. My blood pressure must be so much low this time. I used to ask my dream to hug me when I feel not well like this. Oh god ... why I am crying rite now. This heart feels weary.