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Monday, August 2, 2010

Good Bye My Litle Baby

I just lost my baby this morning when the age was 6 weeks old. At first time, i didn't realize my stomach was in pain. I thought it just usual pain in few hours later i saw blood on my panties, i panicked, trembled and confused. What was it ? was i on my menstruation period ? was something wrong in my stomach ? In hurry me and my husband went to Asih Hospital to check it. I still trembled, what happened ? i've got infusion, i felt down, afraid and more i just accepted what would happened.
My husband always hold my hand said that everything just fine don't worry about anything. In my heart i knew that i would lost my baby something whispered in my ears and thought. I think it was a mother instinct.
We stayed at hospital for one night, sometimes i woke up to see my surrounding and looked my husband, i felt sorry to my baby because i couldn't keep it safely. I didn't regret anything but made good lesson to be more carefully next  day. I waited the morning to come when the time would told me what exactly happened to my baby.
Next morning, i met my doctor, Amru Harahap, he did diagnose observation to my stomach. Something tools entered to my vagina to see how the baby condition. On screen, i couldn't saw little mole in my ovarium anymore. The baby no longer exist. The baby just gone already passed to heaven exactly when i was in bleeding condition yesterday afternoon. It happened because i was too tired, ya ... i realized i did the same activity as like as i wasn't pregnant. Good bye my baby, even your ages only 6 weeks and the gender not recognized yet, i already put my heart and soul in you. I'm sure God already set another beautiful plans for me and my husband. Mommy loves you and misses you. 

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